t4L in a Nutshell: January 2015

1/31/2015 tunes4loons 0 Comments

OMITTED DITTIES (cause we can't blog every amazing song that grazes our path. We do have lives yah know!......well. kinda)

Whilk and Misky- Babe I'm Yours

Wolf Saga ft. Lyon- You Only Live Once (The Strokes Cover)

C H I L D R E N- Back

Tove Stryke- Ego

The Dealer- For a Night (ft. Shells)

LANY- Bad,Bad, Bad

OMI- Cheerleader (Felix Jaehn Remix)

1/30/2015 tunes4loons 0 Comments

DROP EVERYTHING YOU'RE DOING RIGHT NOW 'cause you NEED this song in your weekend! I'm serious, even if it's your kid, pull a B. Spears, drop that sucker and press play. It is 4 minutes and 21 seconds (ooo, so close) of musical magic. The trumpet is a stellar addition and only furthers the claim I made merely one post ago that the trumpet is in 2015 what the sax was in 2014 (woah. Flashbacks to the word associations of the SAT verbal section. Sorry to make everyone relive such a dark time - aka college apps). Looking at the individual elements of this song, they should NOT go together. Like at all. There's everything from the aforementioned trumpet to heavy electronic synth to overly-autotuned-vocals and then there are some vaguely-tropical-but-somehow-also-vaguely-Eiffel-65-vibes. Also it makes me wanna do the macarena, but if you ask anyone who knows me, about 50% of songs do that anyway (The other 50% make me wanna leprechaun dance*). All this shit shouldn't go together, but it does here and that's why Felix Jaehn fucking ROCKS. He has an amazzzzzing ear for samplings and an even better knack for layering. The whole song is basically flawless (© Beyonce, 2k13**) and my only complaint is that this track has been out for 8 months and it did not graze my ears sooner. HYPE MACHINE you failed me! America, you failed me (I blame Obamacare). It's songs like these that make me wish I lived in Sweden or Australia, where the people are cool and, thus, so is the music. THIS SONG IS NUMBER ONE IN BOTH THOSE COUNTRIES PEOPLE! Take note, America, and get with the fucking program (that program being 19-year-old German DJs named after cartoon cats. DUh)

P.S. Idk who the fuq OMI is, but from the album art he looks like a douchhhhhe and a half. I mean his ideal woman is a cheerleader...

*You think I'm over-exaggerating but a rando came up to my friend senior year and said these exact words "you know, i've never actually met Bridget, but every time I see that girl she's dancing like a leprechaun". Verbatum. Sad, however, let me just say that the leprechaun dance doubles as an excellent glutes workout so I'm not ashamed of it!

**Not sure if Beyonce has merely artistic or also legal ownership of the adjective "flawless" so I threw the copyright in there. Better safe than sorry.

Sounds Like: Klingande, Magic System

Jens Lekman- January Postcards

1/30/2015 tunes4loons 0 Comments

Never have I ever felt more hipster than when I listen to Jens Lekman. He is so hipster, he exudes second-hand-bohemianism that seeps into his listeners and infects them with the hipster-holy-spirit*, no matter how preppy the culprit. I'm serious! Play "A Postcard for Nina" for Cher Horowitz and by the end of the song she'll be drinking coconut water and tying a flannel around her old prom dress for an edgy day-look to romp around BK in. Mark my words.

But in all seriousness, Lekman is doing the coolest thing. He's writing a song every week, from wherever he is about wherever he is, and sending them to his listeners. Like leetle musical postcards! (get the title now?) And if you're not swayed yet that Jens is the man, he is also one of Kirsten Duntz' favorite artists!! (Hmmm. That argument sounded a lot better in 2007 but oh well). Here's Lekman's first 4 postcards of 2k15:

Postcard #1- January 2nd, 2015
t4L: Ranking: #4
The beginning sounds like uncannily like heart + soul so that basically ruined the inaugural postcard for me right off the bat. Also I feel like Dido could have also sung this song. Or Regina Spector.  Basically any irrelevant, mid-2000s warbler. Not my favorite but I'll cut him some slack cause he was probably still hungover from NYE while recording it.

Postcard #2- January 9th, 2015
t4L Ranking: #2

Here's the up-beat Jens we all know and love! I am officially dubbing 2015 the year of the trumpet (2014 was the year of the souful sax #leduh). I get some serious "Me-and-Julio-Down-By-The-Schoolyard"-vibes which, don't get me wrong, I dig.

Postcard #3- January 15th, 2015
t4L Ranking: #1

This track rocks mostly because of the story behind it. I'll let JL exaplin it himself (mostly because I don't want to bother with the spelling of "Jukkaakfjndarvnhdo" or whatever the fuq it is): "Yesterday I played a wedding in beautiful Jukkasjärvi, in the very north of Sweden. The couple getting married were two australians, Erin and Alisdair. I’d never met them before but Alisdair wrote and asked if I wanted to sing for them and he seemed sweet so I said yes. And since I was going to sing for them and had to write a song this week I figured why not make the song for them. " This song is also my personal favorite because it contains the pun : "yin-jens" instead of "yin yang" which made me LOL (yeah, I have the humor of a socially-awkward 6th grader, get over it).

Postcard #4- January 25th, 2015
t4L Ranking: #3

The only reason this one beats out Postcard #1 is that he somehow manages to fit "amygdala" into a song. If that isn't a musical-gift, I don't know what is. Also the country-music-inspired harmonies ain't too bad either.

Sounds Likes: Belle & Sebastian,  the two troubadours from There's Something About Mary (i know, i'm right and you're mind was just fucking blown) 

*If the hipster-holy-spirit did take a human form, it would definitely be Wes Anderson #lehipsterprince


Diet Cig- Scene Sick

1/29/2015 tunes4loons 0 Comments

This band DGAFs in a way I wish I could. Everything about "Scene Sick" seems effortless and spontaneous. I mean, they just cut off the song at 1:46! WTF is that about?!? My theory is that they wrote the verses and then got hungry. So they filled the chorus with a bunch of "I don't care" (rly writing from the heart there) and then just said "fuck it, let's make avocado toast now!" (just look at these hipster fucks. No way they don't eat avo on toast). This is the type of song that would play in some vintage-styled, youth-driven indie (think The Romantics or About Alex). Like right after everyone sleeps with everyone else's soul-mates and they are all pissed off, but yet, for some reason, still all sitting in the same room. This song would spontaneously play on the radio (furnished with 50's-styled knobs, of course #itisanindie) and slowly everyone would silently forgive each (only by means of overacted glances) and the whole group would end up on their feet dancing by the end. Problems solved, relationships strengthened and STDs probably gained, but who care's about that part! THE END (storyboard and plot copyright of Bridge Over Troubled Water Films*)

Sry, but don't get me started on films that star Adam Brody or Schimdt from "New Girl" unless you have 2 hours of time. Veering back from films to music (aka from an industry that actually makes money to one that pretends it does), I'm really digging everything about Diet Cig. Their name is sassy and has proper grammar so it already beats about 98.5% of band names out there. And their mid-2000's-alt-rock-with-a-female-lead dynamic makes them an anomaly on the hypeM charts of 2015. ALSO, they hail from upstate New York! Shoutout to all my people who have every suffered through a Upstate New York winter. We share a bond no others do (#-7daily).

*if I ever have a production company OR Maury-styled TV show, I can't help but use that name (i mean, it's the only pun for the name "Bridget" I've come up with in my 22 years of life. Choices were limited. It's not like my name's reality-T.V. ready)(*cough cough* Tila Tequila *cough cough*)

Phoebe Ryan- Mine

1/28/2015 tunes4loons 0 Comments

This girl is the next Tove Lo. CALLED IT (high-fiving a million angels*). Literally the whole track is pop perfection from Ryan's smoky vocals to her relatable lyricism. With last week's release of her "Ignition"/"Do You" cover and now "Mine",  Ryan proves she's someone to watch for in 2k15 (and not just because she has easy-2-spot hair!). I get major "Saturday Night" by Natalia Kills vibes from this. Like tough-girl, know-thyself**, don't-need-a-man, vibes. A topic which, since we live in the age of Beyonce, is suuuuper hot n trendayy (sry, I don't know how to say the word trendy w/o sounding like the most basic betch on the planet. Although, to be fair, i don't think anyone does). 
AND, if it wasn't enough that she creates killer tracks, she also is pretty lol-worthy on "the Twitter" (<-- how my grandpa refers to it). If u get past her Hester-Prynne-on-Acid cover photo, her page is a gold-mine of sassy comments and of what goes on inside a 20-something girl's mind (aka a lot of food cravings). Basically she's t4L if we had real talent and the cajones to dye our hair teal. Here's just a sneak peek of the comedy ur in for by pressing the "Follow" button for this aqua-marine aural anomaly (<-- that literally took me 15 minutes to think up so APPRECIATE THE ALLITERATION AS$HOLES <-- that alliteration 2 pLZ!). 

@ph0eberyan: "Game shows were the only way to find romance in 2008"
@ph0eberyan: "Brb eating pita chips and weeping"
@ph0eberyan: "If u don't have a fupa u don't mean shit to me"
@ph0eberyan: "My hair isn't green it's just made out of weed"
@ph0eberyan: "I'm hunting for string cheese"
@ph0eberyan: "I am the sluttiest girl in IHOP today #grateful"

Told yah. Homegirl fucking gets it #fupaorbust

*If you get that reference then I invite u to dine at my place this weekend (and by dine, of course, I mean we can work on our night cheese 2gether)

**"know thyself" was actually my college's motto..............which sounds rul auto-fellatiotic for a liberal arts school slogan if yah ask me

Sounds Like: Tove Lo, M Maggie, Chloe Black


1/28/2015 tunes4loons 0 Comments

Even though its been over a year since they released ANYTHING, COIN still proves they can produce infectious, fast-paced indie-pop gold. Wayyy back in the first month of this blog we reviewed their single "Time Machine" and THAT was their most recent track til this week's release of "Run" (fun fact: "Time Machine" was the 3rd song posted on t4L EVER!! tbh though, not gunna post a link cause the writing sucks balls #brutal #butTHEMOSTtrue. My writing from 2013 gives the impression I am struggling to write a formal, 5-paragraph essay, having just only recently moved to this country from my farming village in Azerbaijan. Seeing as I've been privately educated since I was 8 and am a 4th-generation American, I am uber embarrassed, thus the lack of link #srynotsry).

Although the beginning kind of gives me "Reptilla" vibes, the rest of the track is totally OG (minus the G obvi. These boys look about as gangster as I do). I really dig COIN's fusion of Bait-Shop-styled* indie-rock and contemporary synth. I mean, finding a rock song on t4L is almost as rare as finding an HBO show suitable for children. So you know this track will rock, both literally and in a more general sense. 

How these guys are a product of Nashville and not Cali I'll never know. But srsly, Nashville seems like where it's at. Not only do they have COIN, but ABC's Nashville films there so people are graced daily by the presence of the TV-Queen and Hair Extrodinaire: Connie Britton aka Tammy Taylor aka Rayna motherfucking James. I imagine she has an effervescent glow radiating off of her at all times. Like Jesus or Tinkerbell (<-- maybe the most un-p.c. thing I've ever said here but if ur cool with it, I am). My one complaint: COIN's philosophy is to create "swirly indie-pop music that makes you feel good" which is cool but also Phoebe Buffay has been living that philosophy since like '92, mkay? (idk which I like more rly, "Jingle Bitch" or "Run". And that is high praise for COIN right thur).  

P.S. for all u Hammy folks out there, do you seem a familiar face in the picture? Looks like Tron has gone Hollywood on us. Guess being forced by frat bros to listen to "Hollywood" by Penguin Prison on repeat will do that to yah (the RAC remix #fuckingduh).

*if you got that reference, u are the Coop to my Summ <3

Sounds Like: Phoenix, WE ARE TWIN, Two Door Cinema Club

Jess Glynne - Hold My Hand

1/27/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

The release of this song ultimately makes me question Clean Bandit's legitimacy as a pop act. Jess Glynne was after all the uncredited powerhouse behind last years monster hit Rather Be. And seeing as we've heard nil from those hipsters in the last 12 months, (ok that's not technically true, but unless u have the new Rather Be, I pretty much dgaf) I am inclined to believe this is who we should be keeping tabs on. Jess Glynne not only has a magical voice, she perfectly straddles the line between house and pop. Hold my Hand is bringing disco realness, and there is something very 90s romcom about it. You know how there are always celebratory scenes at the end !? I feel like it could have soundtracked the last part of Love Actually. Fuck the Beach Boys!! OK I kid. (maybe). I hope this song takes over the world in 2015. Also Jess Glynne, I hope you make it, because I need to see the Pantene commercial you will eventually appear in.

The Preatures- Is This How You Feel?

1/27/2015 tunes4loons 0 Comments

The Preatures are slowly climbing their way up my favorite things list (© 1944, Maria + the von Trapp family singers*). They are now are wedged right below "talking about how drunk I was the night before" (every betches fav thing to do, admit it) and right above Showtime A̶n̶y̶t̶i̶m̶e̶  Sometimes ("anytime", my ass. Their fading, translucent pinwheel haunts my nightmares. Even more than Carrie Matheson's crying-face which is scary AF). The whole track is just instant gratification from the HAIM-styled harmonies to the evident Fleetwood-Mac influence. The groovy bass and funky guitar mesh to create an uber 70s/80s vibe and Isabella's voice literally sounds like the love child of Feist and Blondie. Also, HELLLLLOOO cheekbones. Isab, can I borrow ur modelesque bone-structure for my LinkedIn prof pic? I'm seventeen in the one I have now, so unless I want to be hired as an American Eagle salesperson I think it's about time for a new photo. 

*the von TRAP family singers: new DJ name. DIBS.

Sounds Like: HAIM, Fleetwood Mac, LP, Wise Girl, The Velvet Underground, Wild Belle

HUNNY - Cry For Me

1/26/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

Rock music isn't really my jam. I am not cool enough. When they are catchy enough tho, you will hate me because I will play it until I have ruined it. This is one of those !! File next to : Ain't No Rest for the Wicked, Gold On the Ceiling, all songs by The Strokes. HUNNY are Californian, so I'd like to imagine Seth and Marisa would have journeyed to an L.A. nightclub to see them open for Rooney. Eventually, Kaitlin would have showed up with a violent drug dealer boyfriend and Ryan would have to be arrested for punching him, but the initial music scene would be excellent. I also like the swagger these gentleman are bringing to the table.  Giving no fucks about breaking hearts. I mean, they sing about making ladies cry about them, so they certainly aren't accompanying you to Soul Cycle. I kind of love it. Final observation: reminds me of Flathead by the Fratellis, aka the Itunes commercial song that wasn't Bruises.   Listen !

Brenmar - Hula Hoop (ft. UniiQU3)

1/26/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

Hi, welcome to the Harlem Shake of 2015. Much like Baauer, I had never heard of this DJ person. But low and behold, I clicked on the song, and now I cannot picture a world where I didn't know about Hula Hoop. It's very addicting. And strange enough where it's weirdly catchy. There are upbeat trumpet vibes. The following are the main conclusions I have come to since first listening to it 35 plays ago.

1.  The chorus will make you feel like you are at Zumba.

2. Honestly a vaguely more sexual Cha Cha slide.

3. Azaelia Banks is probably crying somewhere (or rather, plotting a self-proclaimed racist Twitter war) over the fact she's not on it.

4. I want to drink shots when I hear it.

Sometimes non-cookie cutter songs end up on the radio, and I think this could be one of them. Or at the very least become a mild Youtube sensation. Brenmar, plz don't let me down.

Mark Johns - In Paris (Kanye/Jayz cover)

1/26/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

Guys, click on this. I felt very hesitant to listen, mainly because the original is obviously amazing and Katy Perry once murdered it on BBC Live Lounge. (Srsly don't look it up.) But this is..greatttttt. Plot twist: Marks Johns is actually a girl. And her voice sounds like how Banks would sound should she one day decide to stop living in a Twilight-like world of emotion. Further more, she has enlisted a veryy good producer. The vocals are perfectly distorted, and there are my favorite "twinkly star" synthesizers. It also does what a cover should do, which is sound original from the song they are playing. Hi, remember when Coldplay covered Beastie Boys? AND the album artwork has delicious looking macaroons on it. Pink and green ones. What could be more perfect.  ..nothing . Literally my favorite song this month.

Eastside x Ed Sheeran x Chris Brown- Don't x Loyal (Leo Gordy Remix)

1/23/2015 tunes4loons 0 Comments

Imma make this one quick because DJ Balderballs already raved about Eastside's raw original in 2k14. Leo Gordy (which I think is also the name of my 'rents accountant #lamestDJnameever #except4DJRetardVomit #heactuallyexists) ups the tempo and sends Chris Brown and Ed Sheeran on a tropical vacation (LOL. imagine that duo. Ed Sheeran would have to lather on the sunscreen every .25 seconds and who else but C-Breezy could help him reach those hard-to-get spots on his back?). The first :30 seconds of the song SUCKS 'cause, you know, apparently that's the idiotic rule in the industry. But wait the 30 seconds and you'll be in Mashup-Germany-heaven (pulled that reference out of no where. Guess weed isn't affecting my memory as much as I thought. IN YO FACE, NANCY GRACE).

Sounds Like: Naxsy, Mash-Up Germany

Phoebe Ryan- Ignition/ Do You (R Kelly/ Miguel Cover)

1/22/2015 tunes4loons 0 Comments

Phoebe Ryan (That's P as in Phoebe, H as in Hee-bee, O as in Oh-bee, E as in Ee-bee, B as in Bee-bee and E as in 'ello there, mate!*) srsly just created the cover to destroys all covers. Now i'm the first white-girl to bitch about a white-girl rapping but Phoebe brings a Tove-Lo-like-crystalline-sound to this fusion and it just fucking works. I mean, homegirl's written for Skizzy Mars so she must have a little thug in her (that's what she said). It kinda reminds me of Eastside's "Dont' x Loyal" cover, but a little darker and more jittery. The infectious hooks from the originals still grab yah but Ryan's playful yet edgy vocals float over the melodies so perfectly that the song almost seems like an original itself. My one complaint (i always gotta have at least one): other blogs have been raving about her originality with her teal hair, but lykeeee Catey Shaw's been doing that since July. U get no originality praise from me Pheebs. Dye ur hair ginger and take a real risk (the ging life is hard, ask any carrot top about National Kick a Ginger Day. Shit's unfair.).

P.S. This song epitomizes the way like 50% of college students become friends: "Do you like drugs? Do you like drugs? Yeah? Well, me too, me too!" Doesn't work too well unless the whole interaction is covered in a Tito's-drenched haze. But without alcohol like 87% of business deals wouldn't go through so don't feel guilty about using alcohol's reality-altering ways to get past that awkward freshman fall.

Sounds Like: Chloe Black, Eastside, Zella Day, Tove Lo

*I can't believe that was my first Phoebe Buffay reference ever on t4L. I'll up my Friends-quoting game, I promise (Unless we're on a break...) <-- see! already keeping to my promise!

Susanne Sundfør - Fade Away

1/18/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

The reigning queen of weird pop is back yall. Ok maybe that title is held by Grimes, but Susanne Sundfør is #1 in my book. Her most famous track White Foxes changed my life. Being so serious. I once drunkenly berated her on twitter demanding to know the meaning of that song.*** And she's like a massive star in Norway so clearly the Scandinavian people agree. Her newest album Ten Love Songs comes out on Feb. 15th, and this is the single. "Fade Away" is so 80s I expect it to be on the Risky Business soundtrack. There are menacing synths, big drums, and a lengthy keyboard solo so reminiscent of a dated video game it is criminal. On top of it all is Susanne Sundfør's MAGICAL voice, which is witchy and perfect. I know this blog is bitchy but I cannot summon anything bad to say about Susanne Sundfør so I'm gonna go. And if you think I am writing out her name a lot, you are correct. I figured out how to make the ø and I am filled w joy!!! Just wait until MØ drops new stuff.

PS. the Maps remix is unreal, listen to that too.

***She nvr responded and it upsets me still. I've chosen to believe she doesn't speak English (she just sings it...)and that's why.

Coldplay - Ink

1/18/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

I heard this in H&M yesterday, and was convinced it was a remix. Seemed too electro for Coldplay. I went home and googled Ink remix, and shockingly found that no such thing existed (I guess it's not good for anyone's indie cred to remix Coldplay lol). So props to Chris Martin&friends** for keeping up w the times and adding some fancy electric drum patterns to your repertoire. I feel guilty now that I didn't listen to Ghost Stories. Because this song is really good!! And leads me to believe the rest of the album is just as legit. I just struggled to buy the magical love songs of Coldplay in the face of the TRAGIC Conscious Uncoupling of 2014. But I guess I should give it a chance. Maybe my mourning period should be over. I would also just like to take this time to really emphasize how amazing I think Coldplay is. Although this song bears suspicious similarities to Tracy Chapman's "Fast Car" (thanks to a popular Youtube comment for bringing this to my attention), I still think they are one of the best bands of all time. No I'm not being sarcastic. You try writing 100 solid pop songs and then tell me Coldplay sux.

**the truthful name of this band, let's be honest.  

Refs - Pain Goes Away

1/18/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

Omg. Loved this 8 seconds in. I imagine if John Legend was less commercial he would make something like this. NYC-based Refs is 2 people: one is Richard Saunders** and the other produces for Black Light Dinner Party, so they are basically an indie super-group. "Pain Goes Away" is their first song, and it's v slick. Perfect production, and the vocals are soulful and sad. Refs I hope you can top this shit. My only complaint is pretty minor, and I kind of feel like a dick for saying this, but the lyrics feel a little too slam-poetry for me. Maybe this song is about the pain of one of these dude's heroin addictions or something, in which case IM SORRY, but these are some sample lyrics "Who are you to be complaining about everything you don't have / Look at me to lay praise upon you / You feel ashamed cuz you got no (....lyrics that are poorly enunciated) / My love understands you / Right in front of you" Sry but when I listen to fucking music I'm not trying to feel like I'm at church. SINNERS! ALL OF YOU!! Anyways I'm a terrible person and this song rules. t4L out.   

***idk who that is, but another blog I read seemed to think he was an "R&b virtuoso" so I guess I'm out of the loop

Years & Years - King

1/17/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

Hipster One Direction returns!! Guys, I think these boys could go all the way. Every song they release is good. That seems like a dumb and obvious thing, but we have reviewed a lot of music and usually that is not the case. There is a reason Carly Rae Jepsen was never heard from again. They are also getting a lot of hype in their kingdom of Great Britain, which generally points to eventual success Stateside. British people are ahead of the curve. That is fact. UGhhhh where is my hipster British husbanddddd. Anyways, I'm going to see them next week so I will report back. Their newest jam is "King," and it includes everything we have come to love from these men-children: catchy chorus, angsty love lyrics, and sweet sweet harmonies. Love em. YAY (good aconym amirite) plz remember me when you are on z100.

Gosh Pith - Window

1/17/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

Gosh Pith is a band from Detroit. Woohoo! Michigan represent. ***I don't think anyone has emerged from the saddest city in the world since Eminem, so good for these dudes. Their music certainly doesn't sound like it was inspired by 8 mile. Instead I am getting lazy sunny day vibes. All encompassing phrase: Stoned pool party. The guy has non-threatening chilled out voice, and is accompanied by calming guitar. Makes me wanna get a pool chair and float around in a hipster bathing suit and heart shaped sunglasses. I also want to take a moment to say I think the winter is driving me crazy. I want to wake up 3 months from now and have it be 50 degrees. HOW CAN I DO THAT. Since the movie "Click" isn't real, you can find me in my grey sweatsuit trying to forget that i can almost see my breath in my apartment.

**I've never even been to Michigan so I'm not sure why I'm so excited about this

Pat Lok - All In My Head (ft. Desiree Dawson)

1/17/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

Fact: this music is the love child of SBTRKT and MS MR. It's therefore somewhat shocking that Pat Lok doesn't spell his name in all caps, but I have wildly curly hair and my parents have straight hair so crazier things have happened. This Canadian DJ man has produced some excellent vibey electro.  Like I said, the background is almost criminally reminiscent of SBTRKT. Think spacey /far out/ twinkly star sounds. Desiree, are you MS MR? I met that girl once and I don't remember her name being Desiree, but it is possible that I didn't listen to anything she said. I was more like OOOooo famous person take a picture w me so I can Instagram it. It's interesting to think about the fact that for every semi-famous musician, there is most likely a less famous counterpart who sounds exactly like them. I would like someone to make a list of sonic doppelgangers and email it to me. Then I can go see the poor man's Taylor Swift in concert. She would probably even have a posse of Z-list celebrity besties. Jamie Lynn Spears, looking at you.

Soy Sauce - Broken Record (ft. Joni Fatora)

1/17/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

Yes, that photo is a real promotional image put out by DJ Soy Sauce. I'm baffled as to the aesthetic he is trying to achieve. Is it half Kim Jong Um, half successful NBA star? On FB, where he currently has 2000 followers, he offers no explanation, but there is a picture of him surrounded by giant pandas and a hot girl so I think I nailed it. His new song "Broken Record" is very good for what an unsigned person usually produces. It sounds high quality, and contains legit song structure that a lot of DJs wrongly think is unnecessary. Ultimately kind of reminds me of Flume. And like the Australian boy wonder, I'm willing to bet Mr. Soy Sauce is still a young bb. Probably still in high school, and crafted this shit on Garage Band while his mom made him roast chicken for dinner. I wish him luck on his SATs.

BORNS - 10,000 Emerald Pools

1/15/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

This is a guy. I was thrown by both vocals and appearance, but I was wrong, and probably so was the rest of the universe. Crazier things have happened people. Google Bruce Jenner. Jk forget that, I know the recent paparazzi pics are burned in everyone's memories. ***Now that we know BORNS is a dude, we can move on to his amazing gender bender song "10,000 Emerald Pools." A prime slice of indie pop. There are rich layered vocals, soothing background noises, and an explosive dreamy chorus. Definitely a song that will grow on you. First time I felt pretty meh. 15th time I was ready to sing this at karaoke. Ok not really, but it was stuck in my head for 3 hours. Totally the same thing. The title I can't forgive however. It's basically a haiku. Another thing I need to bitch about: BORNS has a slash through the O. (Sry I can't figure out how to do that on my comp). Naturally I assumed he was from Sweden. Then I found out he was from Michigan... OK POSER. Probably went to New Trier.

**** PSA: I am actually using this joke to make this post longer. really what I want to say is LEAVE BRUCE ALONE!!!

James Hersey - What I've Done (Feast Remix)

1/14/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

James Hersey. God love ya but I'm going to be resisting a strong urge to call you James Hershey for um, I don't know, probably the rest of time. Hope you're d with that. Moving on to the important things, Feast has done an excellent remix of Mr. Hershey's new song "What I've Done." Nothing fancy: he has sped up the vocals and added some (low key) bouncy production. It's a nice showcase for Hershey's sad puppy (that's a compliment) singing, and more importantly is highly addictive. I bet it's also much more insteresting than the original. I don't know that for sure, but this song reminds me of the Filious remix of Kodaline's High Hopes, and we all know the original was....inferior. Stay tuned for more from this Austrian dude. I actually stalked his FB and saw a pic w Filious himself, so perhaps the world is about to get a lot better. 

Purity Ring- Begin Again

1/13/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

"Begin Again" is the second track off of Purity Ring's sophomore album, "Another Eternity", and it comes off the heels of the December release of their first single, the slow-burning, edgy "Push Pull". And before that, they hadn't produced a track in "two years" so I can only guess they were chilling on a private island somewhere with Florence and the Machine, laughing at how they are denying the world their amazing music (SRSLY, flo-ro, leave the Maldives or wherever the fuq you've been hiding your musicially-enhanced brain and get back to producing music. Ur really leaving a fellow ginger hanging here when we rly should be sticking together).

Long, Florential-tangent aside, This song has all the attitude and punch I was missing from "Push Pull". Megan James' signature vocals continue to flow with ease and propels PR's listeners into an electro-pop oasis. Her voice could easily tip over into the "did she just inhale a shit of helium from a balloon?", nasal-AF territory, but it doesn't. The whole track just works, fusing trap with a synth-heavy progression and some rul fairy-n-airy vocals. I can only describe the song as a banger, so press play now !! (banger as in anthemic song, not as in "bangers and mash"  le duh). Also I'd just like to add that I absolutely dig their DGAF glares to the camera in the photo. So much 'tude. If i tried to stare that intensely at the camera I'd either look constipated. Or completely blazed out of my fucking brain. One of the two.  

Sounds Like: Phantogram, Grimes, CHVRCHES

Black Coast- Enough (ft. M.Maggie)

1/09/2015 tunes4loons 0 Comments

Srsly digging the combo of Black Coast and M.Maggie as much as Ross and Rachel circa 1995 (sure I was three but I still had a fucking heart. He's her lobsterrr). First they gave us the slinky and mystical chill-wave jam "TRNDSTTR" and no their back and have up-ed the game in a major way. "Enough", with it's hints of Taylor-Swift/ Tegan-and-Sara  poppy goodness, officially has "Black Coast" and "M.Maggie" on t4L's "to watch list" (whiiiiiich, i just started now). The track is just whiny enough to be mainstream-pop but also has the quirky production that the music snobs will love. Really T4L's first fem-pop ditty of the year and perky and intoxicating perfection. Putting this one on the "diva-joyrides" playlist for sure.

Sounds Like: Tegan and Sara, CHVRCHES, PrinzeGeorge, Fickle Friends

Vallis Alps- Vallis Alps EP

1/08/2015 tunes4loons 0 Comments

FUCK. This up-and-coming two-some leave a smaller virtual footprint than Ronald Ulysses Swanson. To the left is the only information they provide on FB. No last-names. Not even a continental-hint on their geographic location. I mean I know they didn't pass 3rd grade English because they wrote "opened on 1992" but that's about it. I can't even make fun of how hipster they look like I normally do!! There are no photos of "David and Parissa" (if those even are ur real names) to be found online. They also pulled a mini-Bey and just dropped their entire EP (their first btw) all on one day. No single-leaking. No hypeM chart-climbing. No hype whatsoever. That's a baller move. Basically, there is more mystery surrounding these goons than MH 370 (I haven't forgotten! wtf happened to that plane #LostIRL). Whatever their background (I'm guessing a Kyle-XY situation myself. Def musically-enhanced aliens. Somebody check, i bet they don't have belly-buttons), their whole EP is airy-electro gold and super fresh. They range the spectrum of sounding like the rave-master "Flume" to the comtemporary "London Grammar" to the mellowed-out "the xx".

Young: Despite the digital annonymity, Vallis Alps is already making an impact on the music-blogging world. "Young" is up to #4 on HypeM charts and there's no denying why. The track has a haunting-hook layered over perfected synthetic minimalism.  The duo somehow manages to create a mesmeric tinge in the vaporous vocal and laid-back guitar. The whole track just screams effortless ease.
Sounds Like: Ryn Weaver (vocally), London Grammar, the xx, Oh Wonder

Thru: Not only does the EP feature their mastery of haunting chillwave-pop, but they also show they can fucking hold their own in the EDM world with "Thru". What seems like another slow-jam ballad for the first 2:30 seconds explodes and the last minute and a half is an amazing experimental-EDM journey. Whether this track's target demographic is crying teenage girls or raving drug-rats in the Dominican, i don't really know but oh well.
Sounds Like: the xx, BROODS, Flume

Oh!: Probably their most main-stream track on the EP, this song epitomizes the term "little ditty". It's so upbeat and highlights a crowd-favorite: acoustic strumming. This one almost sounds like sample vocals over a remix track but I still dig.
Sounds Like: Zella Day (vocally), Flume, BranchezBearson

Reprieve: Don't like this one much. The beginning is giving me some serious "The Winner Takes it All"-from-Mama-Mia vibes. IDK why exactly but I fucking h8 it. I think it's the sad pity-me piano. Sounds like the song in the musical that's only there to give the entire cast time to change. BUT, the track actually evolves into another dream-pop, mellowed-out ditty with a twist of electro-experimentalism so still press play. Sounds Like: AlunaGeorge, London Grammar

Lostboycrow- HiyHiy

1/07/2015 tunes4loons 0 Comments

I'm just really confused #heLP!. HiyHiy? I've looked it up online and "HIY" is only commonly abbreviated for 1 thing: it is an abbreviated version of "Helsingin Invalidien Yhdistys" which is some organization in Helsinki... so either this L.A.-based dude is just OBSESSED with Finland (um, weird.) or he's into using nonsensical titles. I'm guess the latter considering the epithet he's chosen for himself. Which leads to my second source of utter bewilderment. Lostboycrow? rly? Idk whether his inspiration was Peter Pan or The Night's Watch. This guy needs a publicist or someone who knows something about branding and marketing cause right now,  "you know nothing, J̶o̶n̶ ̶S̶n̶o̶w̶  lostboycrow". But looking past the pedophilic title, Lostboycrow's newest single, "HiyHiy" is 50% The Neighbourhood, 50% Foster and the People and 100% AMAZING. His vocals are a "Walter-White's-meth" level of perfection and the edgy hook combined with the whimsical and lively instrumentals turns this into a gem of an alt-pop track. Also combine his stellar alt-electro-fusion with his epic man-bun and 1800s-chimney-sweeper-jacket you'll be in hipster heaven (fun fact: hipster heaven is the same thing as preppy ppl's hell. And vice versa. One man's trash, yah know?).

Sounds Like: MNEK, Tycho, JMR, Brett, Miguel, Steven A. Clark 


FYFE- Through the Wire (Kanye West Cover)

1/06/2015 tunes4loons 0 Comments

Usually covers of rap songs suck (although, to be fair, it's usually because they're being covered by some self-obsessed, 20-year-old girl from her dormroom in Cali who's trying to be the next Karmin*). FYFE, however, (who I can only guess is, in the picture, exploring what it's like to be a toucan) nails the Yeezy cover. He kept the chipmunk vocals and the lyrics but then basically tossed everything else, completely transforming the track into an alt-pop little ditty. FYFE, aka Paul Dixon, obviously knew rap covers were controversial, seeing as he released this statement along with the track:

"Through The Wire' has been stuck in my head for most of the last 10 years. The fact that Kanye West had a track on his last album named I Am A God added a certain amount of pressure to the process, but once I got over the image of him peering over my shoulder whilst I made the cover it came along quite quickly. To Kanye West purists- I’m sorry. To everyone else - I hope you enjoy it."

Track: FREE
EP: $9.99 (Out March 9th)
The image of Kanye looking like this while bearing over FYFE (still in his Toucan Sam paint of course) : Priceless** 

*Kind of sad if you're goal is to be the next Karmin. She was relevant for about .07 seconds. 

**What ever happened to those mastercard commercials. They fucking rocked.

Sound Like: Jon Bellion (why does a male falsetto harmonize so well with chipmunks??), Josef Salvat, SOHN

Angus & Julia Stone- Grizzly Bear (Synapson Remix)

1/06/2015 tunes4loons 0 Comments

Judging from the picture, he's just your average heavily-bearded hipster and she's that porcelain doll who came to life and chased you in that nightmare you had on Tuesday (srsly, that face she's making will haunt my soul until the day I die and "Concerning Hobbits" plays at my funeral*). Basically Angus and Julia are like BROODS on xanax, the only caviat being that BROODS is from NZ and the Stones' from Aussieland (yeah, they ARE separate countries folks!) Tbh, I feel rul stupid for not knowing about this duo before. Their music has been featured on litrchully a million T.V. shows including Skins (U.K version. I pretend the U.S. atrocity nvr happened), Grey's Anatomy, Revenge, Pretty Little Liars and, last but certainly not fucking least, One Tree Hill (#ChadMM4everrrr). The warm synth, harmonies and xylophone all combine to make this one of those tracks that brightens your spirit when you're feeling down about something (or coming down from something; if u didn't choose the drUg LyfE the dRug LYfe chose u). My one complaint: Angus has got some real serious ALT-J-sounding vocals going on.... aka Adam Sandler-sounding vocals (listen to "Something Good" and then  "Red Hooded Sweatshirt" one after the other and you'll understand. But also maybe don't do that because it will forever ruin your opinion of anyone who sings like the love child of Peewee Herman and Michael McDonald).

Sounds Likes: Rhye, The Tallest Man on Earth (the male vocalists sound uber similar)

*jk, my friend already called dibs on that being her funeral song. The only other song on her funeral playlist: Party in the U.S.A.. #theultimatecombo

The White Panda- Say No Diggity (ODESZA/ Blackstreet)

1/05/2015 tunes4loons 0 Comments

You know your school's too small and insignificant when you have a spring concert and "The White Panda" is the best act (to be fair, their only other competition was Sammy Adams, who got boo-ed off the stage*). Considering No Diggity never gets old and bloggers have been jizzing their pants all fall over ODESZA (srsly, gross metaphor but also the most accurate), these two were bound to collide eventually. The two tracks, although separated by 18 years, fit together seamlessly and you actually would guess the vocal track went with instrumental if you had never heard either song (in which case I'm guessing ur Patrick Star and have been living under a rock at the bottom of the ocean for the past 20 years). The White Panda also announced with the release of this song that they're "going back to their roots" and focusing on remixing hip-hop with electronic once again. "Finally! I've been following you guys for the past 4 years waiting for you to return to your roots" said no one ever.

*Surprisingly, not the worst Sammy Adams performance I've seen. #tbt to that time he was playing a suicide-awareness concert and said "I wanted to jump off a building when the Yankees beat the Red Sox last night!"... bet his manager shit is pants when his client said the most un-PC comment of 2009.

Sounds Like: The Hood Internet, Mashup-Germany

Kanye- Only One (ft. Paul McCartney)

1/05/2015 tunes4loons 0 Comments

I lol to myself when I think of the conversation that went on between Kanye and his publicist while deciding to release this track on NYE.

Kanye: " Imma do something that no one else has the innovation to think up. Imma release my track on New Years Eve.
Publicist: "But, Supreme*, everyone's blackout on New Years Eve. No one will even remember that you released it. How about January 2nd?

Kanye: No. The day's gotta be special. Just like me.

Publicist: How about your birthday, then?

Kanye: NOOOO. That's the one day a year Kim lets me play my music  over the surround-sound system. All other days it shuffles between the audio track from her sex tape with Ray-J and her 2011 single "Jam" (Turn It Up)**. Those beats are NOT dope. New Years Eve it is, now go get me a bathrobe. I wanna feel like a sheik.

Ultimately, no one was in any state to give a shit about this track until January 2nd. Looks like the publicist is a publicist for a reason but seeing as Kanye's credo is "Yeezus above all else" you can see how "Only One" ended up with the worst release date in the history of release dates. With it's slow-burn tempo, choir organs and lack of tHuG rhymes, this track definitely isn't classically-Kanye, but it's actually a refreshing breath of fresh air. Furthermore, it's NOT about Kim, so you can like it without feeling guilty (it's about his mum #awwwww). "Only One" is the first single off of Kanye's TBN track (to be named, le duh). Another HILARIOUS anecdote from the planning for this track is that apparently Kanye is claiming that he didn't know who Paul McCartney was before collaborating with him on the lyrics***........ yeah. and I'm Rosa fucking Parks.

P.S. If you see  a man named Henri, tell him about Kanye. He RLY wants Henri to know about him.

Sounds Like: Drake, Kendrick Lamar, Jay-Z

*4got to mention that Kanye makes his work bitches call him "Supreme" likes he's Jessica Lange on AHS. 

**Yeah.... that happened.

***The article photo was taken at the 2009 Grammys... either Kanye's a liar or he's a Drew-Barrymore-from-50-First-Dates situation. Personally, I hope it's the latter and that a steroid-pumped Samwise Gamgee is changing his morning newspaper everyday to keep the charade going. If any celeb had that ailment, it would be the Louis Vuitton Don himself.

Listen to via HypeM for now. Kanye is onto your music-pirating sorcery


1/02/2015 tunes4loons 0 Comments

thanku to BROODS for providing me with my soon-to-be-overused acronym of 2k15 (last year it was SMH, le duh).  L.A.F., or loose-as-fuck, is literally too applicable for all those hot messes you know. Also it's a bitchy statement disguised in an acronym, which is always useful to have in your arsenal IMO. BROODS not only provides us a hilarious title, but the track itself is a hand-clapping, feel-good, pop-rock little ditty (went a little hyphen-crazy there sry). The anthemic chorus and off-tempo drums propel this track into  a more mainstream market than BROODS' past stuff and although it's not radio-material, you'll still see this NZ-duo popping up in the spotlight I'm sure. They're touring later this year with Sam Smith and if buying a ticket to that show doesn't perfectly epitomize the meaning of "killing 2 birds with 1 stone" then idk what does. Oh yeah, and did I mention BROODS is a set of siblings, Caleb and Georgia Nott?!? Yeah, they're brother-sister and yet can still collaborate well enough to create amazing music. The last time me and my sisters tried to collaborate on anything it ended in a lengthy grounding (we had staged the entire movie "Newsies" which basically just entailed us saying we were "on a strike" and trashing the living room while screaming "Seize the Day". EWPS. 10 yr olds r the weirdest.)

Sounds Like: London Grammar, Haim, Purity Ring