t4L in a Nutshell- May 2015

5/31/2015 tunes4loons 0 Comments

OMITTED DITTIES ('cause we can't blog every amazzzzzing song that crossed our path. We do have lives 7 seasons of Dexter to binge-watch)

Sia- California Dreamin'
Reaction: Many people are criticizing her choice of song, as the original is already amazing. But, like, she's Sia and h8rs gunna h8. My thoughts?:

It's f**king Sia. Who r u to judge anyways, rLy?

Darwin Deez- Kill Your Attitude
My Reaction: UGHHHH, I can think of a million people I want to serenade with this song. Exhibit A:

KILL DAH FAHKING ATTITUDE. (my Boston side comes out when I'm annoyed AF or paHking a caHr in the wicked haHt yaHd.)

Filous- How Hard I Try (ft. James Hershey)
Reaction: The puuuuurfect song to accompany late-night star gazes:

Srsly, this is the ideal nighttime chill-out song. I mean, if looking at this gif and listening to this song at the same time doesn't make you feel as elated and mellow as if you had just popped a xanax or 2 then I feel bad for u, you must have a Monica Geller level of uptight, control freak in you.

BEARSON- Imposter (ft. Mark Johns)
Reaction: PURE JOY when I found out our beloved BEARSON had collab'd with our favorite singer Mark Johns (don't let the "Mark" thing fool yah folks!):

HONNE- Top to Toe
Reaction: (1:35 in #lol) ...Wait. This isn't Chet Faker? Oh well, It still f**king rocks:

Little Boots- Better in the Morning

Reaction: This song makes me feel like I'm a powerful 80's businesswoman/ cougar. & I love it!:

ppl just don't wear ornate AF broaches on the reg anymore... #sad

Beirut - No No No

5/31/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

My favorite indie grandfather returns. On the eve of Gov Ball, it is only fitting that I blog an artist that had one of the most traumatizing sets I ever attended. And I've been to Gov Ball 3 times, witnessing sets by all-stars such as Sammy Adams, and the dick lead singer from Passion Pit, who was doing a DJ set of unrecognizable bar mitzvah music. Let me outline the reasons why Beirut's set scarred my soul. I was up to my butt in mud. Literally I looked like I had been doing laps in a swamp. I smelled like a member of Duck Dynasty. My formerly white Converse now resembled gray rhino hooves. I had been abandoned by my drunk friend. I know this is vague but TO THIS VERY DAY that's all I can type without getting mad bout it. I expected to witness a quiet show by Beirut in peace and silence. Maybe sum Elephant Gun, maybe some Postcards From Italy. Even if he had just played You Are My Sunshine on the accordion for 45 minutes I would have been satiated.

Enter: Girl on Ecstasy. I'm not even sure how this creature came to be at Beirut. I know if I were going to roll my face off, it would not be listening to melancholy Eastern European music. But she crossed my path, and ruined my life. I witnessed this girl try to make out with 3 innocent bystanders, including her sober embarrassed friend. Then I watched her throw up on said friend. Her eyes were so crazy I thought she had escaped the set of Girl, Interrupted. I did not want to be frightened at a Beirut concert, and yet there I was, watching Emily Rose have an exorcism. Above all of this, she was screaming about how she just wanted a diet Pepsi. Well, I wanted you to be abducted by medical personnel, but we don't always get what we want. Beirut was great btw. Oh, so is this song.

Savannah Outen- Boys

5/30/2015 tunes4loons 0 Comments

**Insert overexaggerated ramblings about how this is the definition of a fem-pop summer JAM.** Srsly thought, did adding snaps to a song EVER make it worse? #no. Also it has a sort of Drumline-style of percussion that takes me back to the days of a pre-Mariah Nick Cannon (aka pre-p*ssy-whipped Nick. Back when he hosted Wild 'n' Out and still had the "street cred" from being in a late-90's rap group^: The most underrated MTV show of the 00s^^. If this random, mid-00's #tbt didn't convince you to listen to the song, (I ROCK AT TRANSITIONS), this track comes from "Hit Makers Eman and Jon Redwine", who are also the writers of Tinashe's "2 On". This is news to me because I didn't know "2 On" had reached the status of a "hit" although I fully support it being labelled as such!! Overall, my favorite thing about this track has got to be that Outen's vocals possess just the right amount of whine for a pop-princess-HIT. Just like country vocals need their twang, pop vocals need some whine in them. It's not an insult! Adam Levine has made millions off of the fact that his singing voice sounds like an exasperated, spoiled girl (Exhibit A: the "Wiiiiiiiiiill" in the chorus of "She Will Be Loved: a great example of how one man's annoyed, trashed girlfriend is a music-producer's pop-perfect treasure).

^Scratch that. Wild 'n' Out was after Nick Cannon wrote a song for the movie "Jimmy Neutron: Boy Genius". So any street cred was long gone after his song "Parent Just Don't Understand" graced the silver screen.

^^the most underrated MTV show of the 10's hand-down is "Are You The One?" (Ugh, MTV should pay me. The amount I rave about that show on here is mo-def reaching double digits #Ethan&Amber4ever)

Sigma- Glitterball (ft. Ella Henderson)

5/30/2015 tunes4loons 0 Comments

Somewhere Lady Gaga is kicking herself for not claiming the song title "Glitterball" first. The title also kind of sounds like a club that Bill Hader's Stefon would recommend on his segment. *cue Stefon voice* This summer, New York's hottest club is Glitterball. Originally intended as the location of Dina Lohan's personal dance studio, this place has everything. Pugs. Laser guns. A stuck-up cat that is always blocking the front entrance. Escargot. Tic Tacs. Those extremely furry walls from "Get Him to the Greek". And a larger-than-life Peter Dinklage impersonator (yes, that is just a regular, normal-sized human. Spoiler Alert: It's Perez Hilton).

Speaking of having everything, this song has literally allllll the elements of an amazing 2015 brit-pop track. Ella Henderson. Choral Back-Up. House piano that makes me want to drink until I make decisions I thoroughly regret. Strings. "Oooo"'s. And finally that infectious, fast-paced British percussion we hear in soooooooo many track from our fave neighbors across the pond. Sry, but the only way I can describe the drums in this track is that they sound like this looks:


5/29/2015 tunes4loons 0 Comments

Aaaaand t4L's award for the most baffling cover art of all time goes to....... LANY "4EVER!" (runner-ups include: EXGF "Idle Hands"-- which looks like any 13-yr-old boy's wet dream-- and Oliver Nelson's "Found Your Love"-- which looks like Ross Geller's wet dream). I guess I will label LANY's cover art as Pop-Eye's wet dream? However, that's making the assumption that it is spinach in the picture and tbh I don't know my salad greens well enough to make the call. All I know is that Kale sucks unless it is in smoothie form.

Overall, LANY produced yet another shimmery, rhythmic gem for you to listen to while doing chill summertime activities. Their St. Lucia meets Millenial Boy Band sound is literally the purrrrrrfect soundtrack for any beach bonfire or bestie road-trip. Oooor am I the only one who thinks driving around in a retro convertible with ur gal pals is the American dream? Maybe just like every Millenial female's American Dream (I blame the fact that Thelma and Louise, Crossroads and Michele & Romy's High School Reunion all were released during our impressionable childhood years). ALSO, one last thing; I'm loving the exclamation point in the track's title! I'm on Elaine Benes' side; the exclamation point is your friend ppl. <--- Exhibit A: look how abrasive that sentence sounded ending in a period instead of the question mark's straight-laced bro.

Icona Pop - Emergency

5/27/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

YAAAAASSSS QUEEEEEEN. You don't even know how long I've been waiting to deploy that phrase. Well the time is right yall. I started blogging this song 12 seconds into the first play. (That's not an exaggeration. I haven't even heard the whole thing yet.) "Emergency" has so many genres mashed into it I don't know where to begin. IT'S FRANKENSTEIN. First, we have the country hoedown piano. Or maybe it's more polka? Regardless, it's weirder than Timber. Then there's the french horn loop. Bringing some Mr. Saxobeat vibes for sure. Next, I am CONVINCED Will.I.Am is on here. At the beginning of the chorus, some guy yell-sings "Here We Go" over and over, and I am willing to bet all the food in my fridge it's the worst member of the Black Eyed Peas.** Lastly, Icona Pop seems to have adopted the vocals stylings of the Pussycat Dolls, both sonically and lyrically. Exhibit A: "You wanna get higher / Shake that ass / ...I put a little twist in my hips / kiss on my lips"
 Like I said, there's a lotttt going on. But how else would you guarantee a summer hit?! Throw a million tiny pieces of other hits together and BAM, you are riding the top40. How else do you think DJ Earworm has a career?

***Damn right he is --- appl.d.ap & taboo are the bomb and Fergie is married to Josh Duhamel so she escapes my wrath by default.

Cheers Elephant - Airliner

5/26/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

Cheers Elephant, what an amazing band name. 2nd best only to Gold Spectacles. Maybe I will name first two children that. (I guess I will have to become famous for that to be acceptable, but there is plenty of time for me to ascend to Z list stardom and ultimately appear on Dancing With the Stars. I'm about the long game). The last time I heard from these people was their song "Leaves"almost 3 YEARS AGO. Guys, where u been!? 2012 feels like an eternity ago. I didn't even know what Excel was then. Now, I dream about it. Life has killed the dream I dreamed, amirite? It's k tho, because Cheers Elephant is back to remind me that at least music is still good in 2015. "Airliner" starts off being kind of Strokes-y. I think it's the guitars. Also the vocals are kind of similar sounding. But then the chorus hits and this song is pure poppy goodness. Makes me wanna sing La lA laaaaaaaaa (because I don't know the words, not because I have special needs). Last word, my fav lyrics are: "I'm just running through a maze of bread lines" It's silly and cool. Or is it "red lines".... ? This could be awkward.

Elohim - She Talks Too Much

5/25/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

Many people writing about this girl have pointed out that Elohim means god in Hebrew. That's pretty balls to the wall for a stage name. It's one thing to name yourself like, Lady Crazy or Rainstorm, but GOD?! Kanye's fondness for calling himself Yeezus immediately comes to mind here, and we allllll know how people feel about that. But I will say Elohim is bringing it. "She Talks Too Much" is a perfect slice of floaty electronic pop. Yes, pretty much everyone we blog churns that shit out. What makes this one different, T4L!, you are probably saying. Well, Elohim is supplying some A+ snark here. Exhibit A: "It's like she's taking over / She talks too much / It's like the sound of crazy / And it's much too loud / She talks too much" I cannot stop picturing Cecily Strong from the "Girl You Wish You Never Started a Conversation With At A Party" SETH, DO U KNOW ABOUT POVERTY?! IT'S LIKE REALLY BAD. Also I'm picturing myself after 8 tequila shots. Or just sober. I'm really fun. "It's like the sound of crazy" might be my favorite lyric this year. Also Elohim, idk what's going on with your eyebrows, but somewhere Cara Delevingne is crying with jealously. 

Izzy Bizu - Adam & Eve

5/24/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

Look at that QT! The name is also adorable. I just wanna say it over and over again. IZ-e Bih-ZU. Izzy hails from London, and once again, I CALLED IT. (Sorry I'm going to stop doing this, I know literally no one cares. It's like when people say "I knew about this song 3 years ago you guys, god!" Also guilty. I'm working on being a less annoying person. 1 Day at a time amirite.) Her sound is sooo reminiscent of a once titan of British music. No, not Adele. Duffy. Remember her? Well if you don't, she fucking ruled the world for 6 seconds. Exhibit A: "Mercy" appeared on romantic comedy trailers everywhere in 2008. I'm getting similar vibes from "Adam & Eve." Maybe it's the slightly 60s production, or the soul-tinged vocals. Maybe it's the horns section. Idk, music is not a science. There's another group called Noisettes that sounds like this as well. Long story short, I love this song. I hope it ends up on the Bridget Jones 5 soundtrack, because Izzy, that would make you a lot of $$$. I wish you riches and fame! Not too much though, just ask Duffy how that turned out.

Major Lazer & DJ Snake - Lean On (Ft. MØ)

5/23/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

Major Lazer and MØ look like they would throw a pretty amazing house party. They would serve mescalin infused mojitos and great Indian food. There might be exotic wildlife wandering around. The pool would be filled with rose petals, and their sweet collaborations would keep the good vibes groovin all night long. Just don't ask them to play songs by someone else. They don't look like people who are "fans" of the competition. God help you if you request David Guetta. But honestly, they deserve to be those people, because this song is pretty fucking good. So good that I bothered the DJ at Dos Caminos until he told me who it was by. (Yes, Dos Caminos has a DJ, and FYI he is amazing.) MØ brings her poppy eclectic vocal, and Major Lazer supports her with his seemingly endless library of musical instruments. The instrumental part that directly follows the chorus is giving me lifeeeeee. I love. It's kind of kazoo like and also manages to sound cool and melancholy at the same time. How u do that Major Lazer?! Also, here's the part where I ponder when MØ will explode into the stratosphere. She's been turning solid material both as a solo act and a collaborator for almost 2 years. THE TIME HAS COME AMERICA. Put her on my FM radio or else....I will b mad.

Jon Bellion- Woke the F*ck Up

5/22/2015 tunes4loons 0 Comments

Jon Bellion.. is.. "the most INTERESTING MAN in the WORLD". Okay, jk, that honor belongs to Mr. Dos Equis (whose real name is actually perhaps the most UNINTERESTING NAME in the WORLD^) but Jon Bellion does have his own interesting and intriguing idiosyncrasies as well. He has the beard that I imagine Ron Swanson would grow if he ever ditched the signature 'stache. But then he also has the pop-perfect vocals of Adam Levine. Aaaaand I think that makes him probably the only person in the world who I can compare to the lead singer of Maroon 5 and Duke Silver. So big props to Jon Jon. He's 100% original... Except for his musical influences, who he lists as Kanye West, John Mayer, and Coldplay. Pretty mainstream and cliche there. But not everything has to be so underground and indie-hipster ppl! An ALL-CAPS band name does not a good indie song make.

We praised Bellion for his lyrical prowess (is that adjective innately feminine? If so, sry, Jon! Didn't mean it like that!) back in December for his all-too-real track "Human". And on his newest single, "Woke the F*ck Up", he continues to pair his signature quriky, catchy production and relatable lyrics. For example: "we live in an age where everything is staged/ where all we do is fake our feelings". Woah, Jon Bellion. Hit the nail on the f*cking head. Defintiely an off-the-beaten-track sort of hidden gem to get your weekend started. All you have to do is wake dafuq up and press play already!

^It's Johnathan Goldsmith. Such a common and blasé name overall. The irony.

To wrap it up in one pop culture comparison (for all my Arrested Development fans out thurrr), this song IS the musical version of GOB's catch-phrase:

HANA - Clay

5/22/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

Another (stupid) blog labeled this sound as "indietronica." Let me pause and throw up. I have not heard a worse mashup of words since adorkable and Bennifer. Hana, you are much better than this madeup genre would suggest. I would describe this song as the sister-wife of Grimes. However, the vocals are less haunted baby and more angelic ghost. And turns out, Grimes and Hana are going on tour together with Lana del Rey. This makes sense. Who else would a haunted baby hang out with besides an angelic ghost? Lana del Rey is obviously Count Chocula. I know this doesn't make sense, but go watch her 2012 SNL performance and tell me she doesn't sound like a vampire. TAKE THATT BODDYY DOWNTOWNNN. Back to Hana, props to whoever produced this, specifically for letting it breathe. I feel like the urge to put this girl's vocals on some A.D.D. house music would have been hard to ignore. See: Kieza, Ellie Goulding, Alunageorge. Instead, we are treated to some calmer vibes. Chill as a cucumber. U rock don't change Hana.

Shannon Saunders- Electric

5/21/2015 tunes4loons 0 Comments

Meet^ the mellowed-out, British version of Kiesza everyone!! They have the same pretty-n-airy soprano sound that layers perfectly over synth. Also, PLOT TWIST: Kiesza isn't British! She's Canadian. Who dafuq knew?! First Celine. Then J. Biebs. Then Carly Rae. Now Kiesza's all the rage. Canadian music rocks! My next break-out Canadian pop-prediction is a DJ spinning tunes under the pseudonym NAN00K OF DA NORTH.^^ Called it.

Sry, back to Shannon (ADHD is real ppl!). Homegirl floats over these falsetto's like she's Bon f**king Iver and the staccadic, quirky production of her this newest track is everythinggg. I know it's weird to compare a female's falsetto to a male's and intend it as a compliment but Bon Iver sounds so much like "Bonny Ver" that it's mo-def a compliment to Ms. Saunders. Also I dig the opening vocals. Do they not give you some serious "Hideaway" vibes? Like the "baaaby-- I love the-- wayyyy that- nothing's for sureee" part?? Or should I just never try starting to write a review a half bottle of pinot again??

^Actually, Balderston featured this girl wayyyy back in September for her "housey/ electro/ Apple commercial in training song" SheetsSo don't meet her. Just get reacquainted!

^^If you are a die-hard film-buff (or over the age of 92), then, you're welcome, you just got a hilarious laugh. If you're the other 99.35% of the world, you have no fucking idea what I was referencing. It's a movie called "Nanook of the North" and it has a 100% on Rotten Tomatoes, not even exaggerating. You should totally watch! Come back here after^^^

^^^LOLLLLLL. Did you watch it?!?! Heh, it's a 1922 documentary about the eskimo people of Canada's northern-most region. Nawwwwwwt the most entertaining nugget of cinema. Why do I know about this film, you may ask? Because I went to a f**king liberal arts school and took classes like "The Introduction to the History and Theory of Film" and "History of 20th Century Ballet". No joke. Classes like that exist.

Hermitude - The Buzz (ft. Mataya & Young Tapz)

5/20/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

Look at that sassy duo! I feel like Hermitude is acting out a comedy bit in that pic. The Elvis and Costello of Australian trap music. (Flume is obviously Charlie Chaplin). Moving on to less retarded commentary: I had never heard of Hermitude, but they have their own Wiki page so clearly I am out of the loop. On "The Buzz" they have partnered with Mataya (a Weeknd sonic doppelganger) and Young Tapz (a run of the mill rapper) to give us some excellent pregame music. I couldn't drop down lo to this, but I could definitely concoct my mixed drink and try on 7 different outfits to it. And those activities practically require their own genre of music. So good job boys. It's hard to get on that playlist. Easiest one: "10AM at the workplace". I'm basically unconscious at that point, so I could be listening to Nickelback or the Beatles and would not know the difference. You do NOT wanna be on that playlist. Keep up the good work -- one day you could be on my "smoke a bowl and order cookies" playlist. Mecca.

flor - Unsaid

5/20/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

The St. Lucia vibes are strong with these newbies. (The vocals of flor are a little bit creepier, but in a good way.) And honestly, I need some of those in my life because I was pretty let down by actual St. Lucia. They were...disappointing. And I'm being kind, people. Flor, I hope you are AMAZING live, because that's all I need to crown you my new favorite "tropical synth pop band" (a high honor!!) "Unsaid" is so good. I love those synth noises more than a baby's laughter. Also this track is like the perfect pensive driving song. I imagine that if I were to be driving through Wyoming at sunset, I would like this to be playing. Or Bob Seger. It's a tossup. I would observe the rocky terrain and jam out as I decided what to do with my life. I guess I've planned by quarter life crisis out more than I thought. Flor, aren't you glad to be a part of it?! My last comments are on that album artwork (I literally always have something to say about album artwork. Sry). I assume that image is supposed to be a flower of some kind, but all I can think is: that is what a fan would look like to a person on LSD. T4L out.

Oliver Nelson - Found Your Love (ft. Heir)

5/20/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

Oliver Nelson, how dare u scare me with that album artwork! I can't even tell what animal that skull once was. Some sort of bird of prey? Your old dog?! Actually I don't want to know. What I do wanna know (WHAT A BEAUTIFUL TRANSITION) is where you got your knack for pop confections. This song sounds like the love child of Chromeo and Years&Years. Only better because it's infused with some Pharrel-esque funk. Basically a lot of great elements happening here. And this is his first original song! Ugh, Oliver Nelson is probably 15. Making me look bad dude. Both he and Heir*** are Swedish too, which means they are definitely tall and hot. Also I just decided: after the British, the Swedish are #3 nationality in my heart. (America is obviously #1. What Am I, a traitor to my nation?! Hell no. Hot dogs and American Idol 4ever) They have SO many important musicians of my life. Including but not limited to: Robyn, Lykke Li, Avicii, Tove Lo, Mike Snow. And of course...ABBA. Enough said.

**to what? If it's to Ikea plz call me.

*RELEASE* The Chainsmokers- Good Intentions (ft. BullySongs)

5/19/2015 tunes4loons 0 Comments

If I said the phrase "The Chainsmokers" at any point before like 2013, you would have thought I was talking about those 2 #ratchet aunts from the Simpsons, Selma and Fatty or w/e. But NOW? Now you think of those two dudes who created the anthem to Jay-Z's life (talking about "Kanye", obviously. I'm CONVINCED Jay sits in his bathtub, eating Chunky Monkey, blasting "Kanye", and bawling his eyes out whenever Bey is away). 

The Chainsmokers sent this track our way yesterday and, really, they could have sent us the audio track of Gilbert Godfrey choking on a dinner roll layered over a loop of cats in labor and we would have thought it was fabulous! But we're glad they didn't! This is MUCH better. It's a little electro-pop ditty that just SCREAMS for a dance party under the sun. Also, I'm really digging the "Chasing Cars" oscillating piano loop going on in the background. For their newest original, The Chainsmokers have paired up with BullySongs, who you (and we) just found out about now! #lol #theworstmusicbloggersever. This is what Alex and Drew (yeah, according to the e-mail, we're on on a first-name basis w. Los Fumadores**) had to say about "Good Intentions":

"So for us, the song is all about people who set out with the best intentions but end up with with the short end of the stick. The wonderful BullySongs from the UK wrote the topline explained to us that this song is all about those times that say to your lady or moms, 'I am just running to the store, Ill be back in an hour, and end up back at 5am...' and that idea really resonated with us as trouble makers with hearts of gold..."

Basically after listening to this song a half dozen times and reading their message I feel like this track is the soundtrack to Hank Moody's life on Californication. STR8 ↑. Like stick the lyrics into TV-script-format and I feel it's basically the exact same spiel given by David Duchovny's character in the final few episodes of every season. He's like, "I tried to be good and not cheat, but I kinda accidentally ate out another girl instead of u, Karen." #EWPS?! But give me the soundtrack to the Hank Moody's life anyday of the week. I feel like it would be this, a bunch of classic rock gems and maybe some Kid Cudi or some other rapper that 30+ white guys (and me #srynotsry) are into. 

** sry, but their Spanish name was too fun not to write

Other links:

Bears Den - Agape

5/18/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

Holy Mumford & Sons batman!! Okay that's not totally fair. This sound is a bit more pop oriented. But if you are described as folk and hail from the UK... there are only so many words I can type before I mention Marcus & (the brothers who are jealous of him).**** But I am actually getting a more frosty pop vibe. David Gray-ish? I was going to say James Blunt but that is cruel and unusual punishment. Lyrically, however there are similarities between M&S and Bears Den. Mainly everyone and their mother here seems to be hung up on some bitacchh. Exhibit A: "I'm so scared of losing you / I don't know what I can do about it / How long before you go / and leave me here all alone/ I don't wanna know who I am without you" Guysssss, you do not sound like strong independent men here. I know the world is all about Girl Power, but I am about equality (#he4she), and would like to see some Boy Power here. You can survive without Carey Mulligan! Ugh my bad. I mean, you can survive without whoever you guys date. Also the harmonies are beautiful. See, I can be nice.

Afterthoughts: I can only pronounce AGAPE in my head the way Dory pronounces ESCAPE in Finding Nemo. This is...wrong? Is it sad that I'm not fully convinced I'm wrong?

***just did some googling to double check that Mumford and sons are brothers. THEY AREN'T. Life is a lie.

Yuma X - Swimming Pool

5/17/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

This is the only pic I could find when I googled Yuma X that WASN'T anime*** And its only connection to "Swimming Pool" is that a Youtube channel used it as the video image. So really, that could be a weird stock photo that has nothing to do with the artist. Or maybe it's an artsy blogger/model bride on her wedding day. Hopefully she will contact me saying she's outraged I stole this pic. Some #drama for T4L. Ok so none of this really matters, but I felt compelled to inform you that I don't actually know what Yuma X looks like. But who cares, because my ears love this so much! The vocals are delightful, and the production is laid back and complimentary. They don't sound the same at all, but I keep being reminded of Sylvan Esso's "Coffee" when I hear this. It's like both songs emit the same amount of energy. Chill vibessss. Sorry, what a stoned comment. Jesus. My final thoughts are on the title of this song. No where are the words "Swimming Pool" uttered^^. Pretty sure the only words are "I been thinkin bout you". This bothers me. Like, imagine if Taylor Swift had named Blank Space My Little Pony. This is nitpicking tho, because I love it. <3

****this ultimately led me on a long Wikipedia journey of "role playing video games". Yeah. The jury is still out on whether or not I will make a full recovery.

^^^ok guys, MAYBE she says "swim" a couple times. but no mention of any pool

Bebe Rexha - I'm Gonna Show You Crazy

5/15/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

An anthem that describes the essence of T4L. Many songs have come close, but there is no beating the lyrics "So what if I'm fucking crazy" Just, our entire motto. I feel like the world looking upon Derek Zoolander as he unveils Magnum. "THAT'S IT!!" I love that the beginning of the song is pretty calm. It's like a new girlfriend you haven't fought with yet. You love that she's chill, and loves the Walking Dead, and eats pizza with your friends and drinks a lot of beer. Then the chorus drops, and SURPRISE THAT GIRL IS FAKE. I know this because that girl is me. I'm a lot of fun. Aren't we all!?! Also, I need to comment on BB Rexha's commitment to matching her smeared eye makeup to her tanktop.  Just at the top of her hot mess game. Methinks Kesha's about to be dethroned. (Not that she really sits on the throne of anything anymore, but where she once sat could be occupied by BB) Also homegirl's voice is on pointtttt.

Hopium- Right Now

5/13/2015 tunes4loons 0 Comments

This song can really only be described as the love-child of JEREMIH's "Don't Tell 'Em" and Clean Bandit's "Rather Be". It has the same stylish and contemporary R&B style as the JEREMIH slow-jam but the atmospheric, saccadic strings of the 2014 Clean Bandit classic.  I love everything about this slow-burner of an electronic ditty except the accompaniment, which simultaneously captivates and baffles me. The deep, almost-engine-revving noises in the middle get so low and distorted that I wonder if they are male vocals or just some rul grizzly n gritty synthwork. And the high-pitched , Orca-eqsue noises near the end are just as confusing! Those Titantic-sounding, angelic warblings get so high and auto-tuned I can't tell if that sound is produced by a female or by a string instrument. It could literally be the bewailings of a pre-pubescent boy for all I know. All these questions basically fade from my mind while listening to the track, however, as that Kanye-inspired 808-backbeat is as infectious as ever. Also, the music video it definitely worth a watch, and we literally NVR say that. The immature-2-year old in me likes the video because it has really pretty colors, but the 22-year-old-music-blogger in me.... also likes it because of the pretty colors actually. Sure it's probably the most visually-trippy and confusing video since Joe Goddard's "Gabriel", but most people could benefit from introducing more innovative idiosyncrasies like this vid into their lives.

MIAMIGO - Hard To Love

5/11/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

Some new #britishpeople to make your day better. My new short term goal*** is to get this hashtag trending worldwide. I mean, let's just take a minute in the Twitter universe to celebrate the pale/drunk/musical geniuses of the English Isle. There are so many. Ed Sheeran is only the tip of the ice berg. There's also One Direction. And maybe the Beatles? No but I kid I worship the ground these people walk on. How can I trick a UK man into marrying me? Does the accent envy work in reverse?  Do they think my American accent is cute? I have A LOT of questions, and tbh maybe I don't want to know the answers. Ugh I wish I could just live in Shakespeare in Love. Back to the #britishpeople at hand, let's discuss MIAMIGOs new tune "Hard to Love." Initially, I believed that MIAMIGO was a mashup of the words MIAMI GO. I know. I don't know though, for a moment in time I felt it was kind of plausible. Maybe their ultimate goal was to end up at Ultra? Get it?! GO 2 MIAMI WE WILL. But then I realized this isn't Yoda's band. And Mi Amigo is pretty cool to me also. Their song is also cool. It reminds me that I don't listen to enough dancey pop/rock music. Rock on gentlemen. Literally.

*** long term goal is to finish Mad Men.

A$AP Rocky - Everyday (Prod. Mark Ronson)

5/10/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

I can't believe we have arrived at the day where I discuss Rod Stewart on this blog. Did not foresee this happening. I am mostly delighted because now I can talk about the time I saw him on the streets of London. He was wearing a skinny scarf and a spray tan. His arm candy was either a daughter or wife. Essentially he was a fully realized version of my expectation for aging rockstar. Rod Stewart, thnx for never letting me down. Except for the fact you are slated to be in a reality show next fall....yikes. The day I see Eric Clapton on E! will be the true day the music dies. Ok getting back on track; ultimately we are here to discuss the hottest rapper of my heart, Mr. ASAP Rocky. Over the sampled vocals of Miguel and the aforementioned Rod Stewart, ASAP raps about...well actually I couldn't tell you. The delivery is a steady stream of word vomit. Which sounds deceptively gross. It's not, I love it. Sometimes I don't need to know the words. And from the lyrics I can make out, ("I look so good most dykes will fuck me buddy / Yeah I'm a piece of shit / I know I plead the fifth/ tell her holla if ya need some dick") I think it's better not knowing. ASAP, you didn't tell me you were a part of Emma Watson's HE4SHE campaign! Really serving the cause here. Even still, I can't deny the appeal of this song. Also Mark Ronson, aka the would be V.P. to Sia's president, is on here, so plus one million points.

500th POST

5/09/2015 tunes4loons 0 Comments

Yeah. We nvr thought we'd make it to 500 posts, either. 

HELLO THIS IS OUR 500th POST. I feel like SVU!! So many episodes Jesus! Hopefully, unlike this never-ending Dick Wolff crime drama*, you are as excited about the future of t4L as we are :) all 7 of you. We've racked our brains a lot about what to do for this post and, ultimately, we concluded we needed to celebrate our musical roots. "T4L," you may ask your computer screens, "Who are your important musical influences? Perhaps indie kings 'The Strokes'? Canadian indie kings 'Arcade Fire'?" No people, our queen is Celine Dion. No playin'. I've seen her 3 hour concert movie multiple times. She has the voice of a legitimate angel, and if you don't agree with me, you are lying. SO for our 500th post, here is a write-up of perhaps her most iconic music video "It's All Coming Back To Me Now". Enjoyyyy. Or don't, w/e. We get the pageview either way.

**damn right I'm throwing shade at Olivia Benson

First off, if you haven't seen the music video, A POX ON ALL YOUR HOUSES, and here it is:

B: First off, I just want to say --Celine is NOT my queen. That intro was written against my will. The only music video that confuses me more than Celine's is Mick Jagger & David Bowie's "Dancing In The Street". I, personally, wanted to write up Weird Al for the 500th. Amish Paraside >>>My Heart Will Go On.

E: You love her, silence.

B: Since I am not getting a say in this, I say we jump right in. My first thought is on the mediocre if not complex storyline. Over 6 minutes we learn of the tragic yet bizarre tale of Celine's life. Her bofo is struck by a bolt of lightning :(  . So she gives us the most epic house tour since MTV "Cribs" visited Mariah, aaaaaand then maybe has sex with her late-husband's ghost.

E: I feel like it has all the elements of a great romance movie. People make fun of this video but it is basically Ghost with a giant castle instead of a pottery wheel. And people love that shit. 

 B: As trippy as it is, I do appreciate that there is a legit storyline. Remember the days when all music videos had storylines!? I would say most of the vids we see today just involve a combination of slow motion, naked ladies, and fire. And one of the Kardashians (most likely sporting a duck face even though it's no longer 2012).

E: Tru. Celine's much more classy than that. She probably hears the phrase "duck face" and thinks of some French Canadian delicacy of her ancestors. Do people eat face meat? Idk.

B:  Ugh, the phrase "Face meat" doesn't belong here. BACK TO CELINE. I oddly need to comment on her flawless skin in this vid. Gorgeous Celine. What face-wash do you use? Can I hAz?

E: Obviously that comment comment was Quidge's. But of course I agree completely. Celine is flawless (© Beyonce, 2013*).  Except ultimately I am questioning her commitment to wearing a white nighty thing. Is she not mourning her dead lover? I feel like funeral black would have been the sensible choice for paranormal love-making. He probably showed up and was like, bitch I've been dead for 3 days!!

*Sry, not sure what legal authority Queen Bey holds over that adjective. Better safe than served with papers from the Carters' attorney, amiright?

B: Yeah I think she's probably not showing 100% of the sensitivity she should be. Lyrically too. Consider the lines: "I finished crying in the instant that you left / And I banished every memory you and I had ever made" That's aggressive relationship banishment for someone who HAS JUST DIED. Like, he didn't abandon you and move to Japan, he was murdered by Mother Nature.

E: But there is a dichotomy in what Celine says versus what she does!! Like, she says she has moved on, but the shrine to her dead lover is so intense it could only be compared to the Diana/Dodi one in Harrod's. (#obsessive, #agressive) And you just know she lights those candles next to their framed photo every night. A classic battle between head and heart. Celine knows she should move on, but she is unable to. Poor tortured soul.

B: Just who is this guy anyway? I feel like with the amount of #drama happening in this vid, he must be the guy who eventually turned into the Phantom of the Opera.

E: YAAASS. Being fried by a lightning bolt would certainly explain his disfigurement. And the Phantom was rich right? This would account for the fact Celine and he seem to live in an Ottoman Empire palace.

B: Yeah to me their partnership makes perfect sense. Of course Celine needs to date someone who can match her drama. If she lived with Average Joe, there's no way his house would have windy halls long enough for her to run down.

E: Also is it just me, or does the sequence that takes place from 2:51 to 3:06 (in which a camera agressively circles Celine) remind anyone else of the E! Glam Cam on the red carpet events? There is def a similarity, and makes me feel like I am judging her outfit more than I should be. 1997 wasn't kind to anyone's fashion and we need to remember that.

B: I also think that moment can be attributed to overeagerness on the director's part. Tbh, the whole thing looks like it was an over-enthusiastic film school project. Harsh, but joke's on me because the director of this video is probably richer than I will ever be. #thelifeofaClassicsmajor.

E: Yeah Nigel Dick (the director) has also given the world most of Nickelback's music videos, so I'm not sure he had the best judgement. Although he did direct "...Baby One More Time", and that is probably top 5 of all time, no? Maybe Mr. Dick is a genius after all.

B: Yeah well M Night Shamalan made the the Sixth Sense and that didn't make his other 78 movies any less unforgivable. I mean did you see the Happening?

E: It was funny!!

B: Not on purpose.

E: Well, regardless of the track record of Nigel Dick, I think he did justice to both Britney and Celine. He helped her be her best self in "It's All Coming Back to Me Now" Her acting is on fleek (did i use it right?!?! I feel like I'm 80 years old), she looks flawless, and she gets to make out with a hot Phantom of the (Maybe) Opera.

B: And her pipes would make Mariah run away in terror.


B: OK, I love her.

t4L, OUT!

hEpPy 500th mah loons!! See yah at 1000

RHODES - Close Your Eyes

5/08/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

I know we were all very upset by McDreamy's recent passing on Grey's Anatomy. (Sorry if I ruined it. Actually not at all sorry, because if you didn't know, you haven't had contact with humans in 3 weeks.) While I loved McDreamy as much as the next lady, I can say what upsets me most about his death is the fact this song wasn't playing when they pulled the plug. I mean, acoustic Snow Patrol?!!? Comeon Shonda. That song blows. It was bad in 2005, and the 10 year hindsight has only reminded me that along with "Chasing Cars" I used to like Fall Out Boy and Panic at the Disco. Dark times. Rhodes would have been perfect for this moment. When his voice breaks a little bit on "Your righttt besidee meee" I think I could cry a thousand rivers. Such emotion! And truly such a perfect marriage of production and vocals. It's like half Coldplay / half Dido. Rhodes I hope you aren't offended by these comparisons. I love both those musical acts. Like..a lot. 1. Left my body at a Coldplay concert. 2. "Don't leave home by Dido is one of the best songs ever recorded. Sorry if you wanted to be compared to the Arctic Monkeys. Love you. Plz release more.

Eryn Allen Kane- Have Mercy

5/07/2015 tunes4loons 0 Comments

Meet the American Ella Eyre everyone! She's hails from the mid-west and, like my homegirl Ella, has a promising future not only as music's next soulful, pop-diva but also as a Garnier Fructis hair model.  Dem curls, like that voice, are Jess-Glynne fierce, girllll (sry, I will stop talking like I'm Tyra Banks in an episode of ANTM starting RN, I promise).

I really haven't been this into girl-harmonies since Disney decided to add a Greek-style chorus to their 1997 adaptation of Hercules. ("What about Pitch Perfect?", you say in a whiny little bitch voice to your computer screen as you read this post*. Eh, that movie was alright, but, ultimately, I leave the Pitch-Perfect-obsessions to the 16-yr old girls and 25-yr old frat bros of the world). Also props to Ms. Kane's editing skills. In a world where most DJs just don't know when to stop with their edits, layering whole string quartets, soulful sax solos and tropical-house synth all over an old Green Day song that should never have resurfaced to begin with, "Have Mercy" is a breath-of-fresh air. The only non-vocal accompaniment that occurs during the entire 4:40 track is snaps. It's fucking awesome. Elle Woods would approve (snaps for the presences of snaps!! -- sry, but I'm not gonna see an opportunity for wordplay and not have "pun" fun with it.)

The one thing that vexes me about this song is the title. Is Ms. Kane just SO thrilled about the Full House spin-off on Netflix that she wanted to name her first official single after Uncle Jesse's iconic catchphrase? Will her next single be named "Cut It Out" or "You Got It, Dude"?? Actually, on second thought, that would truly amazing if an artist named every song of their EP after a different 90's television catch phrase. +10 points to Gryffindor to the first musician to do this. Here a suggested track list:

Side A
  1. "How you doin'"
  2. "Newman!"
  3. "Did I Do That?"
  4. "Dear Ashley, Thaaaaaaaaat's Me!" (#RIP Amanda Bynes' sanity. Ur deeply missed)

Side B (idk why I sorted it by Side A and Side B like I was making a fucking mixed tape. Just really taking this 90's theme all the way I guess)
  1. "Is That Your Final Answer"
  2. "D'oh"
  3. "Who Loves Orange Soda? Kel Loves Orange Soda (I DO, I DO, I DOOOO)

* #tbt to the most entertaining e-mail of all time 

Here's what shows those are from in case you suck and couldn't get them all:

SIDE A: 1. Friends; 2. Seinfeld; 3. Family Matters, 4. All-That
SIDE B: 1. Who Wants To Be A Millionaire; 2. The Simpsons; 3. Kennan & Kel; 4. Boy Meets World

Nihils - Help Our Souls (Urban Contact Remix)

5/06/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

Congrats on the scary album artwork Nihils. That looks like Madonna and Lady Gaga are fusing their powers together to cast a curse on Adele's vocals. Or even Taylor Swift's frankly. Desperate times for those queens. Discussing Drake's would-be rapist is neither here nor there however. Instead, we are here to talk about non-TMZ artists Nihils and Urban Contact. First off, I wanna say Nihils has the snazziest website I've seen to date. Seriously I'm very impressed. Sleek, and not too busy. Can you help us with ours? My favorite part are the mini-bios, which actually contain no information but have cute pics. Maybe we should talk about your music for a second. All right here goes: I dig it. It's reminding me of James Hershey's "What I've Done." Both of these are remixes, so the similarities could just be conjured from the uptempo makeover that 91% of remixes offer, but whatever GO WITH IT. Lyrically I also like what's happening. "Help our souls tonight / We losing this fight" Otherwise known as my drunken battle to get my apartment door open at 3am. That top lock is a motherfucker. ( k this is a lame joke i already know, I needed to make this post longer don't hate meeee)

Penguin Prison - Try To Lose

5/04/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

ATTNETION: PENGUIN PRISON IS ONE PERSON. Did everyone besides me know this? Feeling pretty dumb, mainly because I have been listening to Hollywood for like 4 years at this point. (ooooO I'm soooo hipster). That's a pretty long time to be missing crucial info. Imagine if you woke up one day to realize you only owned 1 dog instead of the 4 you thought. Actually that is the worst comparison ever made. If that happens to you, you need to put down the weed. And call the police, because you are probably Amanda Bynes in her "dropping bongs out the window/lighting dogs on fire" phase. Anyways, Penguin Prison, I am issuing a formal apology. Plz consider this incident a compliment: I thought multiple brains were involved in this project instead of one SUPERBRAIN. A superbrain that wins prize for happiest music of all time. I know I label music "bouncy" a lot, but when I listen to this song, I literally feel like I could be in Super Monkey Ball. Just boppin around. PP never lets me down. New album "Lost In NY" out now! What r u waiting for, go buy it!!!

Mark Johns - All Day (Prod. Sweater Beats)

5/03/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

Well f**k. Mark Johns has done it again. Actually she has done one better: she has slayed Kanye. Legit, this is the new mother of dragons. I'll tell u why. When we first heard from this bitch a few months ago, she was covering "Ni**As in Paris." If you don't recall, her rendition was my fav track of the month. NO EASY FEAT. While her warbling of Jay (aka Beyonces downtrodden slave** and mortal enemy of Solange) and Yeezus' track is A+, there was literally no way I was going to think it superior to the original. I flailed around to that song for 8 months in 2012. It is part of my soul. On "All Day" however, she blows Yeezy out of the water. While I will defend the work of Kanye West until I die (have children), that song suckkkeddd. The production is basically a rip-off of Monster, and the lyrics are from Niggas in Paris (Exhibit A: "Ball So Hard"). Soooo Kanye is plagerizing Kanye. I mean, of course. Yeezy <3s Yeezy. Ok I'm getting off track. The point I'm trying to make is Mark Johns took a Kanye West song and made it better. Boom. Sweater Beats we are proud of you too.

**this is the part where I can express my extreme hatred for Beysic's Met Ball outfit. Sparkles and nude spanx DO NOT AN OUTFIT MAKE. When Kim K looks better than u it's time to reevaluate your life.

Made In Heights- Forgiveness & Slow Burn

5/02/2015 tunes4loons 0 Comments

Not gonna lie, I thought this band was British until about .25 seconds ago. But, ultimately, that's like the biggest compliment a band can receive from t4L is that we thought they were British. We idolize British music more than Helga Pataki idolizes her closeted Arnold shrine. Sure I could have picked a reference from this decade, or even this millenium, but who doesn't wanna stroll down memory lane and end up at PS 118, amiright???

I really can't say which track I prefer, "Forgiveness" or "Slow Burn".  Both have Sabzi's quirky and intriguing production style and Kelsey Bulkin's soulful vocals. My initial reaction was that she kind of sounds like the ghost of a mermaid. Even though that's a super specific comparison and I have nooooo reference point for what sounds the spirit of a siren would produce, I stand by the observation nonetheless. Like her vocals have this whimsical, wispy quality but also this distorted and muffled edge to them. And the tropical synth in "Slow Burn" ripples through the track, only adding to the aquatic vibes flowing from the LA-duo's most recent single. Basically I have only one praise left and it is in the immortal words of Leslie Knope "Ann Kelsey you poetic, noble land-mermaid"*.

You rock, Made In Heights, don't change. Except maybe the name. I don't get it and thus I h8 it (isn't that how like EVERY religious war started EVER? oh well, still my mentality #srynotsry)

*runners up for my Leslie Knope quote included:
  • "Ann Kelsey, you cunning, pliable, chestnut-haired sunfish"
  • "Oh, Ann Kelsey, you beautiful, rule-breaking moth"
  • and yes those quotes are, amazingly, verbatim #RIPParks&Rec #LeslieKnope4Prez

Writer's Edit: SHUT THE FRONT DOOR. Balderston wrote a review of Made in Height's "Ghost" wayyy back in September (but I didn't read it til now... ewps? t4L's worst fan right here.) Nonetheless, she ALSO got marine-life vibes from these ppl!! I'm officially not crazy. Bulkin's def part sea-nymph. t4L, out!

Sounds Like: Brika, Mirah, REMMI

Other "Made In Heights" tracks on t4L: Ghost