POWERS - Loved By You

7/31/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

This song is so good that when I first heard it, I thought it was a cover of a very famous band.*** Then I did some research (the Internet rules guys!), and discovered this is a shiny brand new one. I swear this is the swan-song Hoku never wrote. The vocals are so sugary I want to go snort some Pixie Sticks. The best part is, there's so much more to this band besides poppy goodness. "T4L" you may be saying as you roll your eyes, "You say this about literally every artist you post about. Please elaborate" Well fuckers, the production rocks here. Warpy synths and fantastic percussion are the only things I can describe with my teeny brain, but there's lots of other stuff going on that sounds amazing. Secondly, the tail-end of the chorus takes this from a B to an A+. If you don't know what I'm talking about, go to 1:30. The yelly falsetto adds an edge that makes "Loved By You" straight up bad-ass. Who am I kidding, Hoku never could have made this song. I NEED MORE, POWERS.

***I cannot put my finger on it, but this song does remind me of another one I can't identify. How descriptive! Maybe one day someone will sue Powers for copyright infringement and I'll finally figure it out.

Duke Dumont - Ocean Drive

7/31/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

When I hear this, I feel like I'm in Miami Vice. I mean, I never saw it, but I'm trusting my vague understanding of 80s culture to tell me this is accurate. And seeing as this song is titled "Ocean Drive," I assume Duke Dumont intended for this vibe. There are white tuxedos, tequila sunrises, and cocaine practically dripping through the speakers. All that's missing is a Ferrari and a gun. So basically, the Bieber version of "Welcome to Miami." Or maybe I'm just projecting. Regardless of what DD's intentions were when he crafted this, I feel this song would also be perfect to soundtrack the biopic of a famous DJ. Aka when they make a Lifetime movie about the tragic love story of Calvin Harris and Taylor Swift,** this song can play when they first lock eyes across the green room of the Grammys. Or Ellen. Whatever. Calvin will already know he's doomed, but Swifty's Voodoo Vagina^^^ has already sucked him in!! Sidenote, I feel like 87% of my posts discuss either Taylor Swift or Calvin Harris. They should probably look into a restraining order.

**does anyone see this heading in any other direction?

^^ this is a medical term that can be applied to many females. Namely, my friend who wears only sweatpants and and disinterest for the world, and still hooks more dudes than Gigi Hadid.

SAFIA- Embracing Me

7/31/2015 tunes4loons 0 Comments

YAAAAASS SAFIA has returned! Okay, maybe the most trendy term of endearment out there may be a little much for this announcement. Like how many of you even know SAFIA and how many of you thought SAFIA was some sort of disease from Southeast Asia? Balderston is a stage 4 hypochondriac so talking about medical ailments isn't out of t4L's wheelhouse*, yah know?

 i LOVE the lyrics of this song. It's the most conceited, vain thing to have come out since R. Kelly released "The World's Greatest" in 2002. "You don't know all the things that could set you free... Like embracing me". That's being like "you know whose perfect and beautiful and charming and in one?! MEEEEE!!!!" I just love love love the egotistical nature of the song. Also, classic, cynical Northeastern right here. It's obviously meant to be a love song about like being able to express ur true self with your one true soulmate blah blah blah and I harp on the fact that the lyrics sound like the douchiest pick-up line of all time. I dare the boys of the world to try reciting the choral part of this to the most depressed-looking girl at the bar. Just be like "you look super upset and trapped in your life. Do you wanna feel even MORE trapped as I engulf you in an axe-body-filled embrace?" Pretty sure that tactic has the exact OPPOSITE success rate as the Bend And Snap. Maybe even lower, honestly. But SAFIA's Hozier-meets-James-Blunt vocals and the warm, ambient synth accompanying them definitely pulls the whole track together and makes it the perfect jam either for a budding-relationship playlist OR as a heartbreak anthem  (v. few song are that versatile, so job well done, SAFIA!)

*WTF is a wheelhouse anyway? And for that matter, what is a showboat? People are always saying to me "don't be a showboat" (cause I'm a white girl so I like to do the not-so-subtle backhanded-brag) and what IS that even? I imagine like a fancy-ass, anthropomorphic sailboat that harbors an affinity for cabaret and is decked out in twinkling lights and an off-kilter pillbox hat.

Afrojack- SummerThing!

7/30/2015 tunes4loons 0 Comments

Guess who's BACK!? Afrojack*! Who drunk-me refers to as "apple jacks" (#ewps?), slurring the cereal like I'm David after the dentist. Although, tbf, my brain is usually working too hard to keep my essential organs functioning to handle trivial tasks like remembered the name of that guy who produced "Take Over Control". But also, apple jack is like a dope name for a pair of DJs from NYC both named jack. Just saying'.

Mike Taylor's groovy, electric vocals perfectly accompany the summertime-in-LA-in-the-70's vibes that ooze from the beginning of this track. Ultimately, the drop is disappointing. Isn't every drop kinda disappointing, tho? It's like, oh great, another saxophone solo. What's that? Oh, more bass that rattles the dance floor so hard that I eat shit in the heels I'm pathetically trying to dance in? Fan-fucking-tastic. This song switches from Uptown Funk to 2001: A Space Odyssey so fast it should be on a Carrie-from-Homeland level of mood stabilizers. But, ultimately, the song has a swoon-worthy front-man and some rul funky, vintage guitar. Also, I like your overall vibes as an artist, Afrojack, so I'll give you a solid B+ for the jam. U get a D- for ur chinstrap facial hair though...

*rewading 10 points for Slytherin to myself for that rocking rhyme**

**& 5 for that alliteration

Pure Bathing Culture - Pray For Rain

7/30/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

I feel like we don't feature Portland based artists enough. Probably because we aren't cool enough to, or because the bands there are too hipster to put their music on the Internet.** Well I am glad Pure Bathing Culture did, because "Pray For Rain" rules. Talk about time capsule.^^ I hear this song, and I am immediately transported back to the angsty scenes of a 90s rom-com. I swear this played when Julia Stiles was mad at Heath for 8 minutes in 10 Things. It's melancholy, a little grungy, and still maintains great pop hooks. The girl has a beautiful emotive voice. (That's fancy code for: I want to cry a million tears when I hear it). Plus, there are real instruments, something we do not often feature on this blog. My only complaint: the lyrics are a little David Copperfield. "Are you cut in two ? / Cut all the way through." Obviously this is a metaphor of some kind, but my mind cannot help but picture some deranged scene from Water For Elephants. 

**do we capitalize internet? Someone help me.

^^The dream of the 90s is aliveeeeeee

RKCB - Ignite

7/29/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

More sad music. Isn't that all you want to listen to on Saturdays?!** To be fair, I fell in love with this one on Monday. I was still filled with regret from losing one shoe (and my dignity) at the club. I heard this, and immediately felt that RKCB understood my pain. Take, for example, these musings: "I wish that I was sober / Don't tell me that it's over / I wish I didn't want you so bad." I'm not trying to be dramatic^^, but these lyrics are very applicable to the loss of my Steve Madden shoe @2am. And the thing is, if I had lost the pair, it would have been much easier to accept. Also a lot less embarrassing. Can you think of anything sadder than a girl walking around with no shoes? Answer: the girl walking around with 1 shoe. But enough of my narcissistic rambling (do people start blogs for any other reason?), I love this track. This is what Sam Smith would sound like if I didn't hate him. What a beautiful voice. RKCB, my only request is that moving forward, you do something wacky with your image to distinguish yourself. Because 4 capital letters for a stage name is b-o-r-i-n-g. Most people probably think you are MKTO. And I don't think you want their fans.

***I know it's Tuesday, but I wrote this on Saturday, and my dumb anecdote took up too many lines for me to throw out. IM SORRYYYY.

^^because non-dramatic people definitely begin all sentences that way

XYLØ - Afterlife

7/29/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

XYLØ fast becoming my fav new Los Angeles people. And I like a LOT of LA artists, so I mean business with that statement. At this point, they've definitely zoomed by London Grammar in my favorites. #byehaters. And "Afterlife" might be the best single dropped so far. It's weird and morbid. That interpretation might sound like a diss, but I love Edgar Allan Poe and graveyards so this shit is right up my alley***. Exhibit A: "I'm waiting for the afterlife / Just show me a good time, baby / somebody save me / I just wanna be loved." I'm reading that as: "The world is so horrible that I would prefer to die unless someone decent happens by"     ....oh is that just me? Regardless of what this song really means, I love it. Unless you tell me it's about the evils of commercialism complete with Greek tragedy metaphors. Then I will throw up. Also random final note, the creepy lady vocals in the opening bars take this to next level. Bye.

***Plz know, I once told my mom that my favorite house in our town was a decrepit 1800s home next to the graveyard, and to this day she believes she gave birth to Rosemary's baby #shedid

EVVY - Tidal Wave

7/29/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

EVVY, I met you when you opened for VERITE here in April, and I was super awk and had no business cards*** But look I really do have a blog!! It's so legit right.^^^ Well, now it is more legit because we can feature this amazing single. "Tidal Wave" opens with my favorite production trick in the game: chipmunk backing vocals. No lie, if I went over to a boy's house and he put that kind of music on, my underwear would turn to ash.*** There's also house piano and a catchy melody. Just overall, a great summer anthem. I mean, I don't think anything called "Tidal Wave" screams snowmen and Santa, but the does production fit perfectly with sunshine and happiness. On another note: I'm already stressed about the deep depression I will fall into when it drops below 50 degress. Jk I loveeeee winter!! (But really, not kidding at all. Someone please offer me a job in San Diego).

***I know I'm being presumptuous for even thinking you remember this, EVVY. But I swear, it did happen. Does anyone else wonder if famous people walk around with handlers who remind them of all the shit they've done before? I'm imagining Madonna's handler whispering behind her, "That's Drake, you once mouth raped him onstage." If Veep and The Devil Wears Prada have any resemblance of real life, I know this is true.

^^^We were once trolled on Twitter by a bunch of Atmosphere fans so tbh I think we have made it.

*** obscure New Girl joke, funniest show that no one cares about

Chet Faker- 1998 (ft. BANKS)

7/28/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

The collab I never even knew I needed is finally here!!  God that wait sucked... #ADHD #millenial #samething. t4L loves miss BANKS so much, she was actually our first ever post! Hate when people say they've been with an artist from the beginning... buuuuuuuuut I've been with the leettle L.A. sprite from the the fucking get-go. AND who doesn't love Chet Faker ?! (aka the Australian version of Mayer Hawthorne if Mayer Hawthorne mellowed out with a bunch of xanax-es.... and if M.H.'s vocal chords ever realized the body they inhabit went through puberty 15 years ago...). Long story short, I'm just saying Mr. Faker's vocals are swoon-worthy AF.  Also the ginger hipster from down under has a beard so lush and rugged it's how I imagine Ron Swanson's beard would look if he ever ditched the signature 'stache (#RIPparks&rec). Ultimately I just feel like these two would throw the coolest party. They'd host like a killer summer darty on a Victorian-era, massive sailboat with a great array of tapas options. And their hospitality would be as warm and cozy as the synth in this song. (Whoops! Almost went through an entire post without saying anything about the track #theworstmusicblogever #sryimlazy #thisisactuallytheendtho #byehaters)

Sandra Lyng- Play My Drum

7/27/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

The 27% of me that is a Pitchfork-level music snob h8s this. HOWEVER, the 4% of me that is European club rat hears it and wants to immediately take tequila shots until I'm drunk enough to think that heels are the move 2night (aka blackout status). The sax. The synth. Even the strumming guitar in the beginning. Everything's working in a sort of formulaic housey-pop kind of way. Which publicly abhors me (k, maybe like 35% music snob). Secretly, though, cliche, sugary pop songs are my absolute favorite genre of music. THATS Y THE SWEDISH TOP 50 FUCKING ROCKS, ALCOHOL LOVERS. It's just one solid dance jam after another. Sure you get the occasionally song that is solely Danish/ Swedish/ Norwegian/ Finnish/ did I fucking get all of Scandinavia covered yet*? But THAT'S Y WE HAVE THE SKIP BUTTON PPL! That and A.D.H.D. probs.

*(can u guys just form 1 music-centric country already? Is there really any significant difference between Norway and Finland? I see none. And together u would rule the music world. Like a country of only ABBAs)

P.S. I took this girl seriously until I looked up a pic to post with this write up. I'm confused cause I thought she was a cool Norwegian hipster or a velvety-vocaled Viking or something but all the images of her just look like her promo photos for Bachelor in Paradise. But, w/e, maybe she will hook up with Jared who also went now that he has returned his patchy facial hair to his 14-year old cousin. ANYONE is better than Krazy-ass Claire**.

** I guess I have completely given up on the notion that boys read this blog. If so, sry for my Bachelor themed rants but I can also assure you they probably won't stop #srynotsry #BenH4Bachelor #okayillstopnow)

Foals - Mountain At My Gates

7/26/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

I have the utmost respect for the rocker who can wear a Barbour and still look fucking cool. I'm serious. Foals you take the preppiest jacket around, a basic beacon for rich American girls (who love fall and their iPhone cases), and you make it look rugged.*** I applaud you. I would also like to congratulate you on this new single. Veryyy catchy. This actually isn't surprising. I caught some of a set at Gov Ball 2 years ago, and the music was a lot dancier than I expected. "Mountain at My Gates," offers the same upbeat indie rock as older cuts^^^ like "My Number." I love the piano loop. Changes the whole vibe of the song I think. I only have one problem, and that is the song title. I know, it comes from the lyrics! But guys, it sounds like the title of a (bad) David Foster Wallace short story. Also it's too wordy to be announced on the radio. You don't see Nicki Minaj droppin singles called "Trouble at My Miami Penthouse" or "That Time I Fought w Taylor Swift." No, her songs are called "Anaconda" and "Truffle Butter," and they sell millions of copies. Definitely for that reason.You're welcome for this valuable advice.

**I'm sure British farmers wear them, but in America, Barbours are worn by stupid white girls. Our farmers wear #walmart

^^^look how pretentious I'm becoming!! Next stop: Beanie-ville & sober cigarettes.

Kiiara - Tennessee

7/25/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

Kiiara ur back!!! I am OVERJOYED! Seriously, Bridget thinks the amount I talk about this girl is weird. But I'm not sry at all, because Kiiara is the best. Gold was #1 on the shower playlist for like 17 days. Which next to Swify's Blank Space, is basically unheard of. And now she brings us "Tennessee," an equally worthy jam. Many elements from the first single are present. For example: spliced up vocals, strong percussive beat, warpy synths. Not to mention confusing lyrics. What does "sipping on that Tennessee" mean? I'm pretty sure it's Hennessy. There are also some philosophical musings that are either going straight over my head, or are surely the result of Kiiara's stoned contemplation. Take the following lyrics: "All these pictures on the internet /Burn them up like a cigarette / We just want that real shit / Now you're just a memory" Someone please tell me what this means. Is it about the fleeting nature of fame?! Mostly I am used to hearing songs about fucking bitches, so this is a head-scratcher. I love it.

P.S. that pic is veering dangerously close to American Apparel territory. I'm all about #freethenip but do we have to be so pensive about it.

White Panda Spotlight - Try Madness/Reflection Stone

7/24/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

To be honest, I have not thought about the White Panda since they visited my college in 2011. Everyone was desperate to hang out with them, but then we realized artists who make mashups are 1 degree away from the annoying drunk girl at a house party who plays 5 songs in the span of 3 minutes. Aka ME. Also the "mashup" as an art form seemed pretty dead to me. Like, Girl Talk was probably the most successful of those dudes, and I imagine he's homeless somewhere, yelling about how his 2006 Bonnaroo set was legendary. But out of nowhere, I heard 2 White Panda "songs" in a row, and I loved both of them. One successfully makes Misterwives "Reflections" tolerable (I know I'm the only person in the universe who hates this song. I admit there's something wrong with me.), and the other throws a poppy hip hop hook over..Muse? If I'm going to listen to a mashup, it needs to be unexpected, and the White Panda dudes are bringing that 1000%. The two songs also fit very seamlessly together. To the point where I feel Kygo and Misterwives should be hooking up. White Panda, you are the ultimate matchmaker. Yente of the music industry. Sorry for doubting ur abilities in my youth.

Major Lazer - Lost (ft. MØ) (Frank Ocean Cover)

7/23/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

Before I begin this post, I need to ask one question. Is MØ a face of Nike...? Her tennis skirt is raising a lot of questions for me. Because that would be a real plot twist. Who knew "Just Do It" could refer to Satanic rituals and midnight raves in the forest?!? Not this girl. Nike's keepin up with the youngsters these days. Ok tangent concluded. What I really want to say is this:  these two!!! To use a horrifying term from Tumblr, I "ship" it. MØ and Major Lazer are proving to be the best musical pairing since ____ (insert 2 people u like. I want to use Sonny & Cher but I feel like that could be controversial). "Lean On" is one of the best songs of the summer, and now this magical rendition of Frank Ocean's "Lost." I admit, I would be happy if anyone at all covered this. Demi Lovato? Sure. James Blunt? I would probably still cry. But Mr. Lazer and MØ bring great energy to this track*** The island vibes are so strong I could probably be struck by a falling coconut in my own apartment. Plus, MØ brings a worldly vibe that makes the lyrics feel more authentic. When she sings "Los Angeles/India/Tokyo/Spain/ lalaaaaaa" I believe she's actually been there. When Frank Ocean sings that, I beleive he follows EarthPix on Instagram.

***typing that sentence makes me feel like Quincy Jones fyi. 

Peking Duck - Say My Name (ft. Benjamin Joseph)

7/21/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

I have concluded that bands who feature lots of different artists are generally better. Reasons why: the back catalog is always more interesting. Like, I enjoy Kings of Leon as much as the next person, but all their songs sound the same. Sex On Fire = Use Somebody. How both of these songs cracked the Top 40 is maybe the greatest prank ever played on America. (That, and Donald Trump's current presence in the political game. Smh.) Guess who doesn't have this problem: Calvin Harris. Also I am easily bored, so a variety of guest stars assuages my ADD. MVPs of this game are Peking Duck. I am more attentive to the singles being churned out by these people than a 14 year old boy watching porn for the first time. We last heard from them at the tail end of 2014 with "High," a Flume-y collab with Nicole Miller. This time around, PD has enlisted rando Benjamin Joseph to bring male vocals to their repertoire. The partnership has yielded a full fledged stomper. Tbh, it's like the Black Keys on molly. Doesn't that sound delightful? For your next collab, I request someone very left field. Paul Simon? Idk. Surprise me.

PS. One of you looks like an exact hybrid of Sirius Black and Professor Snape. I can't even begin to guess what house you would be sorted into.

CHVRCHES - Leave A Trace

7/19/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

GUYS HI. Sorry we abandoned you for a fortnight. I know you were about to issue an Amber Alert. But we are back now, and so is CHVRCHES. Aside from a solitary appearance on the Hunger Games soundtrack 7 years ago, we have heard relatively little from these Scottish pixies in recent times. Maybe they were taking time off to work on the referendum. And now, because that was so successful, they have returned to conquer indie music once more. "Leave A Trace" is a very solid pop gem. This isn't shocking. CHVCHES always brings a strong single. I do have a couple of teeny complaints (also shocking). The title sounds suspiciously like an embarassing environmental campaign. Or is that Boy Scouts?^^^^ Regardless, it's stupid and makes me want to be mean. But no matter, I will always support CHVRCHES. Mainly because: I saw them 2 years ago and almost lit my face on fire trying to smoke a j I rolled myself. I was standing 3 feet from the band and they didn't ridicule me. In case you were wondering, I have not improved in rolling joints.

***I want nothing more than to put it on in the morning as I sift through my dirty laundry, and figure out what's acceptable to wear to work. I'm sorry is this too much information?

^^^I wrote this joke when I thought the song was called "Leave No Trace" Too lazy to think of something else to say, so let's pretend it's called that.

Otto Knows- Next To Me

7/17/2015 tunes4loons 0 Comments

I didn't think Otto Knows could top himself after "Million Voices" and, honestly, he hasn't. Million Voices is a fucking collegiate anthem and I will forever hold it near and dear in my heart right next to my other senior year obsessions like that cute dog that used to wander my college campus. Or cocaine.

Don't get me wrong, though, "Next To Me" is still an amazing, string-studded hidden gem of a track. Simon Strömstedt lends his velvety vocals to the progressive house ditty and it's sweeping melodies and borderline-dance-floor beat makes this the ultimate late-summer soundtrack addition. Also, while researching for this post, I stumbled across Otto's wiki page. Under his "associated acts" section it reads: "Tim Berg, Oliver Ingrosso, Alesso, Britney Spears, Sebastian Ingrosso, Don Diablo". Which means it's time for my favorite games: one of these things is MOST DEFINITELY not like the others (hint: the answer also holds the record for shortest celebrity marriage of all time. Kim Kardashian can't break that record no matter how many losers she marries*). However, as odd as Britney's inclusion in that list seems, it lead me to discover the biggest PLOT TWIST of 2015 thus far: Otto Knows co-wrote and produced "Work Bitch". WHO KNEW?! (probably everyone but me #worstmusicbloggerever). This nugget of knowledge makes me lol hysterically. To think that a guy who can't even claim English as his first language was just sitting at his desk writing "You want a hot body? You better wErK BiiiiiOTCHHH!" is too good an image in my brain.

P.S. Does Mr. Knows look BLAZED OUT OF HIS FUCKING MIND in the accompanying picture or is it just my eyes?

*Basketball sucks and Kanye is straight up a LOSER ppl! Anyone who says shit like "I am the greatest rock star on the planet" or "we all self-conscious, I'm just the first to admit it" has a 0% chance of eating lunch at the cool kids table IMO.

Zara Larsson- Lush Life

7/16/2015 tunes4loons 0 Comments

SMH THIS GIRL IS SEVENTEEN-YEARS-YOUNG. When I was 17 I was doing idiotic shit like mixing tequila, vodka and gin all in one vomit-inducing concoction. When I was 17, I was PAYING MONEY to go to multiple DMB concerts within the span of a year. That's how insanely moronic seventeen-yr-old me was. Meanwhile, over in Sweden, Zara Larsson spends her teen years producing amazing, catchy ditties and building a pretty legit pop-star resume. First she gave us the sugary, summery "Uncover" and now she returns with her most recent single, "Lush Life". I can only describe Larsson's vocals in her newest track as having "Rihanna undertones". An odd AF observation, but true nonetheless. And props must be given up to Zara for her vocal metamorphosis. She's a blonde, Scandanavian girl who straight up sounds like a Barbadian KWEEEEN when she sings. I WISH that was my reality. Too bad when I try to sing I'm a ginger American who sounds like a Drag KWEEEEN just kicked in her scotch-taped nutsack. (Again, an odd AF observation, but I assure you, true nonetheless). Veering back from my (literally) ballsy tangent, The whole track is kind of like a more modern, more bearable "Summer Nights" if Danny and Sandy had actually gotten it on during their summer tete-a-tete. "Lush Life" has all the sentiment of the 1972 classic without the accompanying siren screams from the Pink-Lady-Peanut-Gallery (maybe Sandy would tell you more, tell you more if you SHUT DA FUQ UP and let her finish her story, Frenchyyyyy.)

the bird and the bee- Los Angeles

7/13/2015 tunes4loons 0 Comments

FUCK MY PALE SKIN AND OVERACTIVE SWEAT GLANDS, I'M MOVING TO LA!! "Los Angeles" can only be described as the sound of happiness and its warm, ambient synth convinces me that la-la-land is only full of sunshine and smiles! The song has basically persuaded me to the point that I'm ready to uplift everything, pull a Lewis (or a Clark?) and head out west! Okay, well maybe the fact that Cochella is held there and that it is the only place in the U.S. to get a CHURRO-ICE-CREAM-SANDWICH also makes my decision crystal. fucking. clear.

Also, this chick sounds like Imogen Heap #inagoodway. You know, without the innate I'm-in-a-glass-case-of-emotion-undertones that plague every emo-inch I.H. tracks. Not only do both Imogen and this Inara have  fantastic, I-initiated names, but they both also warble like how I imagine Celestina Warbeck would, aka their vocals sound literally magical (or I just got too stoned before writing this post...).

P.S. rumor is that the cover art is some modernist's attempt at an advertisement for HBO's "7 Days in Hell". His creativity was immediately rejected by the bigwig execs, however, and he tossed his work aside, where The Bird and the Bee, being the leetle hipster-LA* duo that they are, picked it up from the dumpster decided to use it for their album art**.

*I mean, just look at their promo photo above: you can tell by their all-white attire that they are playing croquet ironically and it doesn't get much more hipster than playing croquet or polo ironically

**none of the above is true, but I like making conspiracy theories, so sprrrrrread it!! While ur at it, spread the conspiracy that flight MH 370 is actually in Putin's basement. That's a fun one too!

Marina & The Diamonds - Blue

7/12/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

Shoutout to my little brother who loves Marina & the Diamonds. A lot of the time, I don't understand this love. I saw this bitch open for Coldplay a couple of years ago, and tbh I found her pretty intolerable. Probably because she a) delayed me from seeing my #1 Chris Martin and 2) was wearing a shirt I really wanted from Topshop that was sold out. Nah but for real, she was veryyyy self-important and didn't have the pipes to back it up. Say what you want about Ariana Grande and Donutgate, but I swear if she had broken out in song during that vid, I would have given no fucks if she urinated all over that store. **Voice of an angel*** Anyways, the point I'm making is I'm surprised at how much I like this. Amazing slow burner pop. I was in H&M and almost broke out into fucking dance when the drums kicked in. And the piano riffs are very Vampire Weekend. I'm probably going to go listen to her album now. Sry for being a bitch earlier Marina. MATD convert right here. My brother will be so happy.

Kill Them With Colour X Notorious BIG - Roll Wit Em

7/10/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

First of all, that is maybe the coolest pic ever. I want to frame it and put it on my desk. Or maybe next to my Fleetwood Mac poster. Some tough decisions ahead. While I ponder the Feng shui of the musical artists of my bedroom, let us focus on my favorite mashup of this month, Kill Them With Colour's rework of "Roll Wit Em." KTWC (ugh I really wanted that abbreviation to work out better. Can I buy a vowel?) has captured my heart most recently with "Always Something." If you don't know it, go out in the world and learn. It's my favorite brand of spliced up electronic. Here they employ the same trick, providing a floaty (xylophone infused? help I don't know the instruments) background for Biggie to rap upon. I want to also announce that I believe Notorious B.I.G gets the best treatment from the indie community. No lie, I have yet to hear a bad mashup involving him. All Tupac gets from beyond the grave is an Elton John Contribution lol.***

****I'm only kidding. I CHERISH that song.


7/10/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

Holy Arctic Monkeys batman!! To me, this is quintessential British music. I hear this song and it basically bleeds the union jack and cider. Obviously I love it. We devote most of our time to blogging Swedish girl pop and hyper remixes, and guitar doesn't get enough love. Well here's some love. The vocals are perfectly straddling the rock/pop line. I'm digging the harmony. I know I already brought up Alex Turner, but this is like the best song Last Shadow Puppets never made. I only have a few quibbles. 1. I know these boys are 19, but can we stop naming songs "Youth." I have literally 7 songs named "Youth" in my Itunes library, and all it does it confuse me, and also remind me that I am going to get old. (I didn't say this was a rational quibble). And I'm pretty sure the word "Youth" isn't even in the lyrics!! Lastly, I need to discuss the ever present all CAPS band name situation. I know we have discussed our annoyance of CAPS before, but I want to take this moment to complain about it in a different context. When I write any band out with all CAPS, I feel like I have Tourette's. And when I reread what I wrote, I feel like I can hear myself yelling FRONTEERS. I ask all indie bands to please stop doing this to me. Thanks!****

***how I end every work email I've ever sent. It may seem like a standard sign-off, but it's actually very versatile. If you are happy, an obvious choice.. And if you are mad, it screams passive aggressive. Or aggressive. (Ex: Go fuck yourself. Thanks!)

Hex Cougar - Sweet Dreams (Eurythmics Cover)

7/10/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

I like Annie Lennox as much as the next human, but I've never really grasped the Eurythmics music beyond 80s stereotype. Yes it's amazing, but Sweet Dreams embodies pop music from that time to the point where I can only view it as parody. This one, Whip It, and Tainted Love.*** A trifecta of hairspray, bad synths, and weird music videos. Seriously though, drop everything and watch the Sweet Dreams video. It has many facets, one of which involves blindfolded cello players chasing after horses. Anyways, the point I am trying to make is this; Sweet Dreams ain't on my Ipod shuffle unless my mom is in the car. Hex Cougar changed my mind yalllll. What a beauteous rework. I bet Majestic Casual jizzed himself when he heard this. All I want to do when this plays is smoke a bowl and float away on the harp and sugary vocals. And there's even a pleasant drop! Which is obviously the best kind. I'm not trying to fall off a skyscraper Skrillex style today (or any day). Also shout out to Hex Cougar for his Fat-Jewish style humor, that I discovered via his fB. It is my general opinion that musicians take themselves soooo seriously (For example, how artists refer to a collection of music. It's an album, not a fucking "record" u pretentious assholes), so Hex Cougar is automatically my new favorite person.

***also known as "songs I was forced to listen to at summer camp"

LÉON- Tired of Talking

7/09/2015 tunes4loons 0 Comments

WOW WEEEE WOW. This song is truly a gem. Also I can't help but think that LÉON is the long-lost sister of the Say Lou Lou twinnies (basically on visuals alone. Say Lou Lou has a way more "we popped a bunch of Quaaludes before recording this" vibe. Nonetheless, this chick and the twins both have that "I was teleported to this time from an L.A. beach in the '60's and I have the bone structure of a European supermodel" look going for them). But I dig these funky-meets-fresh-meets-feminism vibes wayyyy more than those of the drugged twins in the dark corner*. The banjo gives me "Don't Wait" by Mapei vibes but honestly maybe that's just because people NVR use banjo in music other than country. BANJO & COWBELL, electronic artists of the world! USE IT. Also props to LÉON for the steel drum... another under used treasure (to see a full list of unappreciated percussions, just listen to Jamie xx's "In Colour". SO many quirky production choices it's amazing!... Not as amazing as "Tired of Talking" though! It even has whistling! Ten points to Gryffindor for that addition, homegirl.

Also guys! I'm learning SO much about keyboard shortcuts! I was too high while starting this post and accidentally wrote the whole damn thing lauding LÈON instead of LÉON, so I learned how to do both an acute and a grave accent!! Fun times. But also... probably should have known that... I did major in Greek** in college and accents are rul prevalent in the language of Europe's deformed baby hand (srsly, WUT is happening over there? There was a Greece snap story that straight up looked like a scene out of Jumanji...).

*"dark corner" aka Australia #duh: Britain's wayyyyy larger and waaaaaay more distant Alcatraz.

**That's not a funny euphemism like "oh I didn't learn anything in my college major, it's basically all Greek to me!". I was a Classical Languages major! It was literally all Greek 2 me! And Latin.... yeah finding that Liberal Arts degree reeeeeally useful in the real world.

Wolf Alice - Bros

7/08/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

Oooo yeah Wolf Alice blowin up rN. I cannot say I am surprised. Once Topshop gets behind you as a musical artist, you are basically homefree***. That might seem sarcastic, but Topshop plays the best music of any store I have ever been in and that is the truth people. Oh also Hollister. I stand by that. Anyways, "Bros" doesn't really sound like the other Wolf Alice music (grungy aF and loved by NME), but I'm posting it anyways. It's breezy and makes me want to ride bikes. I love the reverby backing vocals. Also, I need Wolf Alice to give me more narrative in this story. Is it about best friends? Is it about BFFs that are in love with each other? Is it about 2 BFFs, and one is in love and the other has no idea?!? I think I've been listening to too much Taylor Swift guys, because there are like 5 lines in this song, and all of a sudden I have crafted a full blown rom-com out of it. #single #help

***my reason for making this comment is I saw one Topshop insta from Glastonbury discussing Wolf Alice. That counts right?

Rudimental - Rumour Mill (ft. Anne Marie & Will Heard)

7/07/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

Dear Rudimental,

 I feel such anguish over you. Mainly because I love your music, and I had a terrible reaction to your live performance. And now I feel bipolar and crazy. YOU DID THIS TO ME. And listen, it probably wasn't your fault. It was cold, and I was drunk. But like we said in our Gov Ball (2 line) review, you had 34 people on stage during your performance, and this irked me. Mainly because most of these people looked like groupies. Oh excuse me, "tambourine players." You know the only other bands (I've seen) with that many people onstage? Edward Sharpe and Of Montreal. Now one of these bands is a cult, and the other is ...strange*** I'm just saying, maybe you don't need to be the size of my crazy Catholic aunt's family. Ok, I'll stop being mean now. Because I LOVEEE this song. "Rumour Mill" perfectly encompasses everything great about Rudimental; casual and catchy electronic. Or as I like to call it: rave on your couch music. Like, I want to groove when I hear this song, and also recline. Lastly, this band makes me have allll the feels. Take some of these lyrics for example. "I don't care bout what they say," makes me want to cry, because when they sing it, I FEEL LIKE THEY DO CARE. Don't let those rumors get u down guys. I probably made them up.

*** I'll leave it to you to figure out which is which.

Canons - Down On Love

7/06/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

My love for La La land continues this week. Cannons are a group of bad bitches*** from ______ (insert Los Angeles neighborhood. I would guess, but the only one I know is the "Valley" and I'm pretty sure it's offensive to ask if someone is from there), and they are BRINGING it in new single "Down On Love." Instead of the sunny lo-fi pop we are accustomed to (a la Best Coast), Cannons brings us some L.A. noir vibes. It's like depressed Goldroom. I swear this song would have been a million times better for True Detective than the dumb shit that's currently soundtracking it. Although to be honest, I don't think True Detective Season 2 deserves Cannons. I mean guys, am I crazy?! It's so bad. It should have been called "Famous Actors Recite Terrible Dialogue and Repeatedly Tell Each Other The World Is A Terrible Place." HBO, you need to go to your room and THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU'VE DONE. Anywayssss, long story short: obsessed with this song. Except that album art scares me. I fear if I had given this song a bad review Cannons would have done some weird voodoo shit to me.

***just found out they are two dudes and a girl, but guys can also be bad bitches

Robyn- Call Your Girlfriend (Thero & Taylor Wise Remix)(ft. Allison Weiss)

7/05/2015 tunes4loons 0 Comments

I didn't think Frankie's "Problems, Problems" could get any more sugary and summery but Thero accomplished this with his remix back in March. And he does it again with his most recent rework of Robyn's "Call Your Girlfriend". We all know Robyn: She's spunky, her hair is so platinum I've heard she has legally blinded 4 people in Britain with it, AND she rocks cropped-sweaters which, rumor has it, are made from the same fabric as that magical, furry wall from Get Him to the Greek (Robyn, if ur reading this pLz tell me where I can purchase one of these amazing pygmy-puff sweaters! ty ty).

But Thero takes the original track for which Robyn has become so known for and reworks it in all the right ways. His additions are spot-on, from the soulful sax during the bridges to the glittery, thumping synth throughout. Also, I honestly don't think I've gotten so emotional from string-accompaniment in a song since I saw the final audition scene from Save The Last Dance for the first time (THAT ROUTINE ROCKED. Also, lol... #tbt to when Julia Stiles was an A-List celeb. Now she can't even turn her recurring guest role on Mindy into a supporting cast character). Although my over emotional reaction to this remix could also be a result of other factors besides the saccadic strings:

1. It is HOT AS BALLS in NYC and my apt has NO AC. So perhaps the heat has finally gotten to me and the control I once held over my emotions has fallen to complete and utter shit

2. Or perhaps I get teary-eyed listening to this because I subconsciously get major flashbacks to the Lennon and Maisy version. Sure, it's considered lame to have your celeb icon be someone younger than you, but MAISY STELLA U R MY IDOL, 1999 birthdate and all!

Little Giants - Lately (Love, Love, Love)

7/03/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

This song represents a mashup of my two favorite genres: boy band and house. I mean honestly what could be better. "Lately" specifically feels like a hyrbrid of the Mr. Probz song "Waves" and anything by Years & Years. It's soulful and poppy. Hearing it makes me want to be fourteen*** and simultaneously be at a rave. Which, if you think about it, is pretty horrifying. Ravers should never have braces. For starters, molly would definitely get stuck in those rubber bands. But discussing the minimum age for raving is neither here nor there. Back to "Lately," I want to comment on the very sexual vibes happening here. On a scale of Lance Bass (non-sexual^^^) to Justin Timberlake (veryy sexual), this song is a Michael Jackson (the black years). If I wrote all the lyrics out I think my pants would catch on fire. Exhibit A: "So let's step into the lightning / Gonna set your body free / Only known you for a minute / But it's good enough for me" YAASS. Fuck that eternal love shit, let's be in love for 1 night!! Little Giants, thanks for making the one night stand cool, because guess what, SOME OF US think that's fun too.

***aka the height of my boy band mania. #JoBros4ver

^^^sry if you are offended by this. But I could never date a man who, in 2015, voluntarily HAS FROSTED TIPS. Also this is a moot point because he's married. And I have a vagina.

Kiiara - Gold

7/01/2015 Tunes For Loons 0 Comments

Tbh, I have no idea what's going on in this song. Sort of like how I feel when I hear ABBA's songs in Swedish. All I know is it sounds good and I want to listen to it forever. In "Gold," Kiiara (aka hipster Frida Kahlo) has run her human vocals though an electronic chipmunk wood chipper. So basically, imagine Fargo but with rainbows and glitter instead of blood. And A Bushwick apartment instead of the Siberian mid-West. The results are tiny fragments of high pitched vocals, bouncing around for 3 and a half delightful minutes. As for the lyrics? Honestly, they are up to the superfan who attempts to add them to AZLYRICS.COM (***not sponsored*** I'm personally into songmeanings.com^^^). I do have some interpreted phrases here tho. They run in order from most-to-least assured of their accurancy:

1. "If you love me never let me go" 97%.

2. "I miss you in the basement" 82%

3. "caught up in my tea" 69%

4. "tastes like money when I speak" 44%
This could appear in this song, or it could be a stray Kanye West quote I picked up.

4. "My roof is on fire and you never let me know" 35%
Well that's a pretty dick move.

Kiiara, if you ever read this please lmk if any of these are right. I feel like since I basically gave myself a test and grade, I need the validation of knowing if I'm right or not.

^^^how else would I know what "American Pie" is about??